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How do you avoid falling into a situationship?
如何避免陷入状态恋情？
A situationship is two people behaving like they are in a relationship, sex, intimacy time together but the expectations and ground rules are never made explicit, which can result in confusion and ambiguity.
状态恋情是指两个人表现得像处于恋爱关系中，有性生活，有亲密时光，但期望和基本规则从未明确说明，这可能会导致混乱和模糊。
They may work for some people. Most people find them unsatisfying, destabilizing and a potential waste of time.
它们可能对某些人有用。大多数人发现它们不令人满意、不稳定，而且可能浪费时间。
Some ways to avoid this include: first, be clear. Some people are afraid to be clear because they don't want to be perceived as needy or demanding or don't want to scare the other person off. It's better to cut your losses early.
避免这种情况的一些方法包括：首先，说清楚。有些人害怕说清楚，因为他们不想被视为有需要或要求太多，或者不想吓跑对方。最好尽早止损。
Second, don't rush into sex. When sex happens fast, it is easy to slide into a situationship, especially if that works for one person.
第二，不要急于发生性关系。当性爱发生得很快时，很容易陷入状态恋爱，尤其是如果这对一个人有用的话。
Third, figure out what they want early. You don't need to interrogate someone on a first date to find out if they want a commitment.
第三，尽早弄清楚他们想要什么。你不需要在第一次约会时盘问某人是否想要承诺。
But early on, you can explore what someone is looking for and pay attention to their answers and their actions.
但在早期，你可以探索某人正在寻找什么，并注意他们的回答和行动。
Fourth, don't weave narratives about the situationship. You may spend a lot of time daydreaming and romcalming what you hope this will be
第四，不要编造关于状态恋爱的叙述。你可能会花很多时间做白日梦，幻想你希望这会是怎样的
and even maintain the fantasy that as they spend more time with you, that they will fall in love and want more. Don't be sure about that.
甚至保持幻想，认为随着他们花更多时间与你在一起，他们会坠入爱河并想要更多。不要对此抱有信心。
You are lovable but they may not be willing to commit to the expectations of a relationship. Pay attention to the reality, not just what you want it to be.
你很可爱，但他们可能不愿意承诺一段亲密关系的期望。关注现实，而不仅仅是你的幻想。
