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Somewhere in this room, she is sure, is the answer to what happened.[qh]
在这个房间的某个地方，她确信，就是所发生的一切的答案。[qh]
And there, on the bottom shelf of the bookcase, she sees the neat row of diaries lined up by year.[qh]
在书架的底层，她看到一排整齐的日记，按年份排列。[qh]
Marilyn had given Lydia her first diary the Christmas she was five, a flowered one with gilt edges and a key lighter than a paper clip.[qh]
莉迪亚五岁那年的圣诞节，玛丽琳送给了她的第一本日记，那是一本镶着金边的花日记本，里面的钥匙比回形针还轻。[qh]
Her daughter had unwrapped it and turned it over and over in her hands,[qh]
她的女儿打开包裹，在手里翻来覆去地看了一遍又一遍，[qh]
touching the tiny keyhole, as if she didn’t know what it was for.[qh]
她摸了摸小钥匙孔，好像不知道那是干什么用的。[qh]
“For writing down your secrets,” Marilyn had said with a smile,[qh]
“因为你写下了你的秘密，”玛丽琳微笑着说，[qh]
and Lydia had smiled back up at her and said, “But Mom, I don’t have any secrets.”[qh]
莉迪亚也冲她笑了笑，说:“可是妈妈，我没有什么秘密。”[qh]
At the time, Marilyn had laughed.[qh]
当时，玛丽琳笑了。[qh]
What secrets could a daughter keep from her mother, anyway?[qh]
一个女儿能对她的母亲保守什么秘密呢?[qh]
Still, every year, she gave Lydia another diary.[qh]
然而，每一年，她都给莉迪亚另一本日记。[qh]
Now she thinks of all those crossed-out phone numbers, that long list of girls who said they barely knew Lydia at all.[qh]
现在她想起了那些被划掉的电话号码，那一长串说她们根本不认识莉迪亚的女孩名单。[qh]
Of boys from school.[qh]
那些学校里的男孩。[qh]
Of strange men who might lurch out of the shadows.[qh]
那些可能躲在阴影中的陌生人。[qh]
With one finger, she tugs out the last diary: 1977.[qh]
她用一根手指拽出了最后一本日记:1977年。[qh]
It will tell her, she thinks.[qh]
它会告诉她答案的，她想。[qh]
Everything Lydia no longer can.[qh]
莉迪亚再也不能告诉她的一切。[qh]
Who she had been seeing.[qh]
她一直在和谁见面。[qh]
Why she had lied to them.[qh]
为什么她要对他们撒谎。[qh]
Why she went down to the lake.[qh]
为什么她去了湖边。[qh]
The key is missing, but Marilyn jams the tip of a ballpoint into the catch and forces the flimsy lock open.[qh]
钥匙不见了，但玛丽琳将圆珠笔的尖端塞进了锁扣，强行打开了脆弱的锁。[qh]
The first page she sees, April 10, is blank.[qh]
4月10日，她看到的第一页是空白的。[qh]
She checks May 2, the night Lydia disappeared.[qh]
她查了5月2号，莉迪亚失踪的那天晚上。[qh]
Nothing. Nothing for May 1, or anything in April, or anything in March.[qh]
什么都没有。5月1日没有，4月也没有，3月也没有。[qh]
Every page is blank.[qh]
每一页都是空白的。[qh]
