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Everyone has been talking about the bird test.
每个人都在谈论小鸟测试。
The bird test is about whether your partner actually responds to what John Gottman calls a bid for connection.
小鸟测试是关于你的伴侣是否真的对约翰·戈特曼（John Gottman）所说的“建立联系的尝试”做出回应。
Bids for connection happen when we share something or communicate with our partner and hopefully they respond and recognize what we are sharing.
当我们与伴侣分享某事或交流时，就会发生建立联系的尝试，希望他们能做出回应并注意到我们所分享的内容。
One person in a relationship shares something sort of inconsequential with a partner, for example, look, what a pretty bird, and then observes whether their partner pays attention, maybe even notices it with them.
恋爱中的一个人与伴侣分享一些无关紧要的事情，例如，看，多漂亮的鸟啊，然后观察他们的伴侣是否注意到了。
Oh yeah that's a beautiful bird. Or do they ignore it? Or do they lash out and behave in a dismissive manner?
哦，是的，那是一只漂亮的鸟。还是说他们会忽略它？或者大发雷霆，表现出轻蔑的态度？
The research suggests that relationships where partners turn toward each other have a far greater probability of long-term success.
研究表明，相互关注的亲密关系更有可能长久。
It means the partners are attuned, value each other enough to pay attention even to the small stuff and both people feel seen and heard.
这意味着伴侣们彼此理解，彼此重视，甚至会关注小事，双方都觉得自己被看见、被听到。
If a partner repeatedly does not respond to these bids, doesn't look up for their phone or revel in any of the small joys a partner points out. It is not a good sign.
如果伴侣反复不回应这些尝试，不看手机，也不享受伴侣指出的任何小乐趣。这不是一个好兆头。
It's not really about the bird but the lack of attunement. Sometimes a bird isn't just a bird but rather a sign: are you able to take the time and be connected enough to your partner?
这其实与小鸟无关，而是缺乏协调。有时，鸟不仅仅是一只鸟，而是一个迹象：你是否能够花时间与伴侣保持足够的联系？
