The growing up of the corn,as is hinted in my Journal,had at first some little influence upon me,and began to affect me with seriousness,[qh]
前面我在日记中已经提到过,在大麦刚刚长出来时,我曾一度想到上帝,并深受感动,[qh]
as long as I thought it had something miraculous in it;[qh]
因为我最初认为那是上帝显示的神迹
but as soon as ever that part of the thought was removed,all the Impression which was raised from it,wore off also,as I have noted already.[qh]
但后来发现这并非是上帝的神迹,我感受的印象也就随之消失了
Even the Earthquake,tho'nothing could be more terrible in its Nature,[qh]
地震该是大自然最可怕的景象了吧,[qh]
or more immediately directing to the invisible Power which alone directs such Things,[qh]
而且,这往往使人想到冥冥中的那种神力,这种神力往往又与上帝或天意联系在一起
yet no sooner was the first Fright over,but the Impression it had made went off also.[qh]
可是,在最初的一阵恐惧过去之后,关于神力和上帝的印象也马上随之消失
I had no more Sense of God or his Judgments,much less of the present Affliction of my Circumstances being from his Hand,[qh]
我既不觉得有什么上帝,也不认为有所谓上帝的审判,也没有想到我目前可悲的处境是出于上帝的意旨,[qh]
than if I had been in the most prosperous Condition of Life.[qh]
好像我一直生活得十分优裕舒适似的
But now when I began to be sick,and a leisurely View of the Miseries of Death came to place itself before me;[qh]
可是现在,我生病了,死亡的悲惨境遇渐渐在我面前呈现
when my Spirits began to sink under the Burthen of a strong Distemper,and Nature was exhausted with the Violence of the Feaver;[qh]
由于病痛,我精神颓丧;由于发热,我体力衰竭
Conscience that had slept so long,begun to awake,and I began to reproach my self with my past Life,[qh]
这时,我沉睡已久的良心开始苏醒,并开始责备自己过去的生活
in which I had so evidently,by uncommon Wickedness,provoked the Justice of God to lay me under uncommon Strokes,[qh]
在此之前,我罪大恶极,冒犯了上帝,所以现在上帝来惩罚我,给我以非同寻常的打击,[qh]
and to deal with me in so vindictive a Manner.[qh]
用这种报应的手段来对待我