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Lydia had been wrong about Louisa, of course.
莉迪亚对路易莎的看法当然是错的。
Back then, on his daughter's birthday, James would have laughed at the very idea; the thought of anyone other than Marilyn in his bed, in his life, was preposterous.
当时，在女儿生日那天，詹姆斯会对这个想法嗤之以鼻；一想到在他的床上，在他的生活中，有除了玛丽琳以外的任何人，都是荒谬的。
But back then, the thought of life without Lydia had been preposterous, too. Now both of those preposterous things have come true.
但是在那时，想到没有莉迪亚的生活也是荒谬的。现在，这两件荒谬的事情都变成了现实。
When Louisa shuts the apartment door and returns to the bedroom, James is already buttoning his shirt. "You're going?" she says.
当路易莎关上公寓的门回到卧室时，詹姆斯已经在扣衬衫了。“你要去哪里？”她说。
Inside, she still clings to the possibility that Marilyn's visit was just a coincidence, but she is fooling herself, and she knows it. James tucks in his shirt and fastens his belt.
在内心深处，她仍然坚持认为玛丽琳的来访只是一个巧合，但她是在自我欺骗，她知道这一点。詹姆斯把衬衫掖好，系好腰带。
"I have to," he says, and they both know this is true, too. "It may as well be now." He's not sure what to expect when he reaches home. Sobbing? Rage? A frying pan to the head?
“我必须这么做，”他说，他们都知道这是真的。“现在还不如。”他不知道回家后会发生什么。哭泣？愤怒？头顶上的煎锅？
He doesn't know yet, either, what he will say to Marilyn. "I'll see you later," he says to Louisa, who kisses his cheek, and this is the one thing he's sure of.
他也还不知道他会对玛丽琳说什么。“待会儿见，”他对路易莎说，路易莎吻了吻他的脸颊，这是他唯一能肯定的事。
When he enters the house, just after noon, there is no sobbing, no rage—just silence. Nath and Hannah sit side by side on the living room couch, eyeing him warily as he passes through.
刚过中午，当他走进房子时，没有哭泣，没有愤怒，只有沉默。纳和汉娜并排坐在客厅沙发上，警惕地看着他走过。
It is as if they are watching a doomed man march to the gallows, and this is how James himself feels as he climbs the stairs to his daughter's room, where Marilyn sits at Lydia's desk, eerily calm.
就好像他们在看一个注定要死的人走向绞刑架，这是詹姆斯上楼去女儿房间时的感觉，玛丽莲坐在莉迪亚的书桌前，意外平静。
For a long while, she says nothing, and he wills himself still, keeps his hands steady, until she finally speaks. "How long?"
有很长一段时间，她什么也没说，而他则保持冷静，双手紧握，直到她终于开口。“多久了？”
Outside, Nath and Hannah crouch on the top step in wordless accord, holding their breath, listening to the voices that carry down the hall. "Since—the funeral."
在外面，纳和汉娜蹲在最高一级台阶上，都保持沉默，屏住呼吸，听着楼下传来的说话声。“自从葬礼开始。”
"The funeral." Marilyn, still studying the carpet, presses her lips into a thin line. "She's very young. How old is she? Twenty-two? Twenty-three?" "Marilyn. Stop it."
“葬礼。”玛丽琳仍在仔细端详地毯，嘴唇抿成一条细线。“她很年轻。她多大了？22？23？”“玛丽琳。停下来。”
Marilyn doesn't stop it. "She seems sweet. Quite docile—that's a nice change, I suppose. I don't know why I'm surprised. I guess you're long overdue for a trade-in. She'd make a very nice little wife."
玛丽琳没有停止。“她似乎很甜美，很温顺——我想这是个不错的变化。我不知道为什么我感到惊讶。我想你早就该折价换新的了。她会成为一个非常可爱的妻子。”
James, to his surprise, blushes. "No one's talking about—" "Not yet. But I know what she wants. Marriage. Husband. I know her type."
令詹姆斯吃惊的是，他脸红了。“没人在说——”“是还没有。但我知道她想要什么。婚姻。丈夫。我知道她喜欢的类型。”
Marilyn pauses, remembering her younger self, her mother's proud whisper: a lot of wonderful Harvard men. "My mother spent her whole life trying to turn me into that type."
玛丽琳停顿了一下，想起了年轻时的自己，想起了母亲自豪的低语：哈佛大学有很多了不起的男人。“我母亲一生都在努力把我变成那种人。”
At the mention of Marilyn's mother, James stiffens, as if he has turned to ice. "Oh, yes. Your poor mother. And then you went and married me."
一提到玛丽琳的母亲，詹姆斯就像冰一样僵住了。“哦，是的。你可怜的母亲。然后你就嫁给了我。”
He chokes out a laugh. "What a disappointment." "I am disappointed." Marilyn's head snaps up. "I thought you were different."
他强忍住笑意。“多么失望啊。”“我很失望。”玛丽琳猛地抬起头。“我以为你与众不同。”
What she means is: I thought you were better than other men. I thought you wanted better than that. But James, still thinking of Marilyn's mother, hears something else.
她的意思是：我认为你比其他男人好。我以为你想要更好的。但詹姆斯还在想着玛丽琳的母亲，听到了别的声音。
"You got tired of different, didn't you?" he says. "I'm too different. Your mother knew it right away. You think it's such a good thing, standing out. But look at you. Just look at you."
“你厌倦了与众不同，是吗？”他说。“我太不同了。你妈妈马上就知道了。你认为这是一件好事，引人注目。但看看你。看看你。”
