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Love, Hannah decided, would be sweet, like her mother's perfume, and soft as marshmallows.
汉娜断定，爱会像母亲的香水一样甜美，像棉花糖一样柔软。
Quietly she extended a finger, gouging a small dip in the perfectly smooth surface of the cake.
她悄悄伸出一根手指，在光滑无比的蛋糕表面挖了一个小坑。
"Hannah!" Marilyn snapped, and swatted her hand away. While her mother smoothed the dent with the spatula, Hannah touched the frosting on her finger to her tongue.
“汉娜！”玛丽莲厉声喝道，然后甩开她的手。当她用抹刀抹平凹痕时，汉娜把手指上的糖霜放到舌头上。
It was so sweet her eyes watered, and when Marilyn wasn't looking, she wiped the rest of it onto the backside of the tablecloth.
它是如此的甜美，以至于她的眼睛都湿润了。趁玛丽琳不注意，她把剩下的部分擦在桌布的背面。
She could tell by the little line between her mother's eyebrows that she was still upset, and she wanted to lean her head against Marilyn's aproned thigh.
她从母亲眉间的细纹看出，她仍然心烦意乱，她想把头靠在玛丽琳系着围裙的大腿上。
Then her mother would understand that she hadn't meant to mess up the cake. But as she reached out, Marilyn set down the tube of icing mid-letter and lifted her head, listening.
然后她妈妈就会明白她并不是有意要把蛋糕弄糟的。但当她伸手时，玛丽琳把糖霜放在字母中间，抬起头倾听着。
"That can't be them already." Beneath her feet, Hannah felt the floor shiver as the garage door groaned open. "I'll get Nath."
“不可能是他们了。”当车库门呻吟着打开时，汉娜感到脚下的地板在颤抖。“我去叫纳。”
By the time Hannah and Nath arrived downstairs, though, Lydia and their father had already come from the garage into the hallway, and the moment for Surprise had passed.
汉娜和纳下楼时，莉迪亚和父亲已经从车库来到走廊上，Surprise的时刻已经过去了。
Instead Marilyn took Lydia's face between her hands and kissed her on the cheek, hard, leaving a red smudge of lipstick, like a welt.
相反，玛丽琳用双手捧起莉迪亚的脸，在她的脸颊上用力吻了一下，留下了一抹红红的口红，就像一条伤痕。
"You're home early," she said. "Happy birthday. And congratulations." She held out a palm. "So? Let's see it." "I failed," Lydia said.
“你回来得真早，”她说。“生日快乐。祝贺你。”她伸出一只手掌。“所以呢？让我们看看吧。”“我没通过，”莉迪亚说。
She glared from Nath to their mother, as if daring them to be upset. Marilyn stared.
她瞪着纳，又怒视着母亲，仿佛是在挑衅他们，让他们不高兴。玛丽琳盯着她。
"What do you mean, you failed?" she said, honest surprise in her voice, as if she had never heard the word. Lydia said it again, louder: "I failed."
“没通过是什么意思？”她说，声音里带着真诚的惊讶，仿佛她从来没有听到过这个词。莉迪亚又说了一遍，声音更大了：“我没过。”
It was almost, Hannah thought, as if she were mad at their mother, mad at all of them. It could not be just the test.
汉娜想，她几乎是在生母亲的气，生他们所有人的气。这不可能只是测试。
Her face was stony and still, but Hannah saw the tiny trembles—in her hunched shoulders, in her jaw clenched tight. As if she might shiver to pieces.
她的脸僵硬而平静，但汉娜看到了她微微颤抖——在她佝偻的肩膀上，在她绷紧的下巴上。仿佛她会颤抖得粉身碎骨。
She wanted to wrap her arms tight around her sister's body, to hold her together, but she knew Lydia would only push her away. No one else noticed.
她想抱紧姐姐的身体，把她抱在一起，但她知道莉迪亚只会把她推开。没有其他人注意到。
Nath and Marilyn and James glanced at each other, unsure what to say.
纳、玛丽琳和詹姆斯面面相觑，不知说什么好。
"Well," Marilyn said at last. "You'll just study the traffic rules and try again when you're ready. It's not the end of the world." She tucked a stray lock of hair behind Lydia's ear.
“好吧，”玛丽琳终于说。“你只要研究一下交通规则，准备好了再试一次。这并不是世界末日。”她把一缕乱发塞到莉迪亚的耳后。
"It's okay. It's not like you failed a school subject, right?" On any other day, this would have made Lydia boil over inside.
“没关系。你又没有挂科，对吧？”要是换了别的日子，莉迪亚准会气得发疯。
Today—after the necklace, after the boys in front of the car, after the test, after Louisa—there was no room left in her for anger. Something within her tipped and cracked.
今天——在项链之后，在汽车前面的男孩之后，在考试之后，在路易莎之后——她已经没有生气的余地了。她身体里的什么东西倾斜了一下，裂开了。
"Sure, Mom," she said. She looked up at her mother, around at her whole family, and smiled, and Hannah nearly ducked behind Nath.
“当然，妈妈，”她说，抬头看了看母亲，又环视了一下全家人，然后笑了，汉娜几乎躲到了纳的身后。
The smile was too wide, too bright, cheery and white-toothed and fake. On her sister's face it was terrifying; it made Lydia look like a different person, a stranger.
她的笑容太宽，太亮，太快活，牙齿雪白，很假。她姐姐的脸上写满了可怕的表情；莉迪亚看起来就像变了个人，一个陌生人。
Again no one else noticed. Nath's shoulders unhunched; James let out his breath; Marilyn wiped her hands, which had grown damp, on her apron.
还是没人注意到。纳的肩膀放松； 詹姆斯松了口气。玛丽琳用围裙擦了擦湿漉漉的手。
"Dinner's not quite ready yet," she said. "Why don't you go up and take a shower and relax? We'll eat early, as soon as it's done."
“晚饭还没准备好，”她说。“要不你上楼去洗个澡放松一下吧？我们一做完就早点吃。”
