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When he heard the station’s late-night sign-off and the national anthem begin to play,
当他听到电台深夜节目结束，国歌响起时，
he would slip the scraps of Marilyn’s note into the envelope and tuck it back into his shirt pocket.
他会把玛丽琳便条的碎片塞进信封，再塞回衬衣口袋。
Then he tiptoed into the living room, where the children lay curled up together on the floor by the sofa,
然后他蹑手蹑脚地走进客厅，孩子们蜷成一团躺在沙发旁的地板上，
illuminated by the test pattern on the television.
被电视上的测试图案所照亮。
The Indian at the top of the screen glared as James carried first Lydia, then Nath, to bed.
屏幕上方的印第安人瞪着眼睛，看着詹姆斯先抱着莉迪亚，然后抱着纳上床睡觉。
Then—because, without Marilyn, the bed felt too empty, like a barren plateau—
然后——因为没有了玛丽琳，床感觉太空了，就像一块贫瘠的高原——
he returned to the living room, swaddling himself in an old crocheted afghan on the sofa and studying the circles on the screen until the signal cut off.
他回到客厅，把自己裹在沙发上的旧阿富汗钩针衫里，仔细研究着屏幕上的圆圈，直到信号被切断。
In the morning, it all began again.
第二天早上，一切又重新开始。
Each morning Lydia and Nath, finding themselves back in their beds, wondered for just a moment if the universe had righted itself:
每天早晨，莉迪亚和纳发现自己又回到了床上，一时间都在想，宇宙是否已经恢复了正常:
perhaps they might enter the kitchen and find their mother at the stove, waiting for them with love and kisses and hard-boiled eggs.
也许他们会走进厨房，发现母亲在炉子旁，用爱、吻和煮熟的鸡蛋等着他们。
Neither ever mentioned this most tender hope,
谁也没有提到这最温柔的希望，
but each morning, when they met in the kitchen and found no one there but their father, in rumpled pajamas, setting out two empty bowls,
但是每天早上，当他们在厨房里见面时，发现除了他们的父亲，没有其他人，穿着皱巴巴的睡衣，摆着两个空碗，
they looked at each other and knew.
他们对视了一下，就明白了。
Still gone.
仍然不在。
They tried to keep busy, trading the marshmallows from their cereal to make breakfast last as long as they could:
他们试图让自己忙碌起来，用麦片里的棉花糖做交易，让早餐尽可能长时间地持续下去:
a pink for an orange, two yellows for a green.
一红一橙，两黄一绿。
At lunchtime, their father made sandwiches, but he never got it right—
在午餐时间，他们的父亲做了三明治，但他从来没有做对——
not enough peanut butter, or not enough jelly, or cut crosswise instead of in triangles like their mother would have.
没有足够的花生酱，或者没有足够的果冻，或者切成横向的而不是像他们的母亲那样切成三角形。
Lydia and Nath, suddenly tactful, said nothing, even at dinner, when there would be peanut butter and jelly again.
莉迪亚和纳突然变得圆滑起来，即使在吃饭的时候，也没有说什么，因为这时又会有花生酱和果冻了。
The only time they left the house was for the grocery store.
他们唯一离开家的时候是去杂货店。
“Please,” Nath begged one day on the way home, as the lake glided past the car windows.
“求你了，”一天，纳在回家的路上恳求道。
“Please can we swim. Just an hour. Just five minutes. Just ten seconds.”
“请问我们能游泳吗?”只是一个小时。仅仅5分钟。只是十秒。”
James, his eyes on the rearview mirror, did not slow the car.
詹姆斯的眼睛盯着后视镜，没有让汽车减速。
“You know Lydia doesn’t know how,” he said.
“你知道莉迪亚不会游泳，”他说。
“I’m not ready to play lifeguard today.”
“我今天还没准备好当救生员。”
He turned onto their street, and Nath slid across the backseat and pinched Lydia’s arm.
他转到他们那条街上，纳特从后座上滑过，捏了捏莉迪亚的胳膊。
“Baby,” he hissed. “We can’t swim because of you.”
“宝贝，”他嘶嘶地说。“因为你，我们不能游泳。”
Across the street, Mrs. Allen was weeding her garden, and when the car doors opened, she waved them over.
街对面，艾伦太太正在给她的花园除草，当车门打开时，她挥手让他们过去。
“James,” she said. “James, I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“詹姆斯,”她说。“詹姆斯，我有一段时间没见你了。”
She held a sharp little rake and wore pink and purple gloves,
她拿着一把锋利的小耙子，戴着粉色和紫色的手套，
but when she leaned on the inside of the garden gate and peeled them off,
但是当她靠在花园的门里面，把它们剥下来的时候，
Lydia spotted half-moons of dirt under her fingernails.
莉迪亚在指甲里发现了半月形的污垢。
