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Chandler: Guys, guys, I've got great news! Guess what ...
各位！各位！我有个好消息！猜猜看。
Joey: Uh ... Monica's pregnant? !
莫妮卡怀孕了！
Monica: Really? Let's get past the moment.
真的吗？当我没说过。
Phoebe: What's your news?
是什么好消息呢？
Chandler: Thank you. I got a job in advertising.
谢谢。我找到一个广告工作了。
Monica: Oh, honey, that's incredible!
亲爱的，这真是太棒了！
Phoebe: Gosh, what's the pay like?
天啊，薪水怎样呢？
Phoebe: Oh, come on, people, come on, now, if I don't know who makes the most, how do I know who I like the most! Hey Joey!
喔，你们，别这样。如果我不知道谁赚最多，我怎么知道要最喜欢谁呢！嗨，乔伊！
Chandler: Well, actually, it pays nothing. It's an internship.
额，实际上，没有薪水，是实习的工作。
Joey: Oh, that's cool. We have interns at 'Days Of Our Lives'.
哇哦，酷诶，《我们的日子》也有实习生。
Chandler: Right. So, it'll be the same except ... less sex with you.
没错，所以是一样的东西，不同的只是不用常跟你上床。
Ross: So, uh, what kinda stuff do you think they'll have you do there?
你觉得你去那里要做什么呢？
Chandler: Well, it's a training program, but at the end, they hire the people they like.
这只是个训练课程，但是之后他们会择优录取。
Phoebe: That's great.
太棒了！
Chandler: Yeah, I mean, there's probably gonna be some groundwork which will probably stink, you know, grown man getting people coffee is a little humiliating.
是呀，我是说，会有一些底层的可能很糟糕的工作，你知道，成年人给别人倒咖啡有点丢脸。
Chandler: Humiliating and noble!
丢脸，却高贵！
Chandler: Thank you.
谢谢你。
Ross: You know, if-if I didn't already have a job, I-I think, I would have been really good in advertising.
如果我不是早有工作了，我应该会在广告业做得很好的。
Monica: Ross, you did not come up with "got milk?"
罗斯，“今天喝牛奶了吗？” 不是你想出来的。
Ross: Yes, I did, I did!
是的，是我想的！是我！
Ross: I should have written it down!
我应该要把它先写下来的！
Joey: Hey!
嘿！
Monica: Hey!
嘿！
Joey: Where's Chandler? I wanna wish him good luck on his first day, and I smelled bacon. Haha.
钱德呢？我想要祝他第一天上班愉快，而且我也闻到培根香了，哈哈。
Monica: He just left.
他才刚走。
Joey: Who did?
谁才刚走？
Rachel: Joey! You never gonna believe it: she called.
乔伊，你不会相信的！她打来了！
Joey: She did?
是吗？
Rachel: You got it!
你得到了！
Joey: I did?
是吗？
Monica: What is she talking about?
她是在说什么呢？
Joey: I don't know, but it sounds great.
我不知道，但是听起来倒是挺棒的。
Rachel: Your agent called. You got that audition.
你的经纪人打电话来，你得到试演的机会了！
Joey: With-with Leonard Hayes?
跟李奥纳多·海斯吗？
Rachel: Yes.
是的！
Joey: Oh my God, that is great!
我的天啊，太棒了！
Joey: That is gonna for a play on Broadway and in a real theatre, not that little one underneath the deli like last time.
这是在一间真的剧院百老汇的一出戏，而不是像上次一样，是在快餐店下面的那种。
Monica: Is it a good play?
是一出好戏吗？
Joey: Well, it must be, because I read it and I didn't understand a single word.
肯定是的因为我读了剧本，而且根本连一个字都看不懂。
Rachel: And Leonard Hayes is starring in it ...
李奥纳多·海斯也会参与演出……
Joey: Yeah, yeah, and directing.
是啊，兼导演。
Monica: Oh, he was so good in that movie of MacBeth.
他在《麦克白》的演出真是精彩。
Rachel: You saw that?
你有看吗？
Monica: No, but ... I saw the previews. They played it right before Jackass.
没有，但是我看了预告。他们在《蠢蛋》播出之前有预告。
Rachel and Joey: Ah!
哈！
Joey: Yeah, yeah, yeah, he has, he's done some amazing work.
他做了些挺好的东西。
Rachel: Oh, yeah. Oh, I loved him in those cellphone commercials.
喔，是啊，我喜欢他的电话广告演出。
Joey: I know. When the monkey hits him in the face with that giant rubber phone?
我知道，猴子用巨形塑胶电话打他的脸？
Monica: Hey! Maybe the monkey will be at the audition!
或许猴子也会在试演会上！
Joey: Don't make me more nervous than I already am!
别让我再更紧张了！
Chandler: Good morning, everybody.
早安。
Intern: Can I get you a cup of coffee, sir?
我可以帮您倒咖啡吗？先生。
Chandler: Oh, no, no, I'm an intern, just like you guys ... except for the tie, the briefcase ... and the fact that I can rent a car.
喔，不，我是实习生……就跟你们一样除了这领带，公事包，还有我已到达合法年龄可以租车以外。
Intern: Seriously, you're an intern?
真的？你是实习生？
Chandler: Yeah, well, I'm kinda heading into a new career direction and, you know, you gotta start at the bottom.
我在转换职业跑道中得要从基层做起。
Intern: Dude!
老兄！
Chandler: Right. Look, I know I'm a little bit older than you guys, but it's not like I'm Bob Hope
我知道我比你们大一些，但不至于像鲍勃·霍普（喜剧演员2003年辞世）一样。
Chandler: The comedian? USO? !
喜剧演员？USO（慰问军队组织的发起者）？
Intern: Uh, it's USA, sir.
先生，美国是USA。
Receptionist: This is Joey Tribbiani. Joey, these are the producers and, as you probably already know, this is Leonard Hayes.
这位是乔伊·崔比亚尼。乔伊，这几位都是制作人，而你或许早就知道了，这位是李奥纳多·海斯。
Joey: Wow It is so amazing to meet you. I'm such a big fan of your work.
哇哦！能够见到你真是太惊喜了，我是你的超级影迷。
Leonard: Well, I've ... I've been blessed with a ... a lot of great roles.
我很幸运能够演出许多很棒的角色。
Joey: Tell me about it! "Unlimited nights and weekends!"
那倒是没错，“不限分钟 不限时数！”
Leonard: You making fun of me?
你是在取笑我吗？
Leonard: Because I am not a sell-out.
我可不是背叛者。
Leonard: I didn't do that for the money, I believe in those phones.
我不是为钱而做的，我相信他们的电话好用。
Leonard: I almost lost a cousin, because of bad wireless service.
一家很烂的无线电话公司，害我差点失去一个表哥。
Joey: No, no, I-I-I wasn't making fun of you, honestly, I-I think you were great in those commercials.
不，我不是在取笑你，我认为你在广告里的演出很棒。
Leonard: Really?
真的？
Joey: Yeah.
是的。
Leonard: Well, I do bring a certain credibility to the role.
嗯，我倒是真的有说服力扮演那角色。
Joey: Are you kidding? When they shoot you out of that cannon ...
何止如此，当他们拍摄你从火箭筒冲出来时……
Leonard: Peeeeeooooooooch "Hang up that phone!" One take.
“挂掉那个电话！”一次就拍成。
Joey: Wow.
哇。
Leonard: So, shall we uh, read?
那我们要开始了吗？
Joey: Oh, yeah, sure.
喔，是的，当然。
Leonard: Top of act two.
第二幕开始。
Leonard: This's my entrance. You got it?
我会出场，知道吗？
Joey: UH huh!
嗯哼!
Leonard: What the hell are you still doing here?
你为什么还愣在这里？
Joey: Err, I think you know.
我想你知道。
Leonard: Bastard!
混蛋！
Joey: I am what you made me. You know what? I could go right now.
这都是你造成的，你知道吗？我现在就可以走。
Leonard: Go, go!
走！走！
Joey: I can't. Oh, I want to, Long Pause ...
我不行。喔，我想要，长暂停……
Joey: but I can't.
但是我不行。
Leonard: So, sorry.
很抱歉。
Leonard: You-you're not supposed to say "long pause".
但是你不应该说出“长暂停”。
Joey: Oh, oh, I thought that was your character's name, you know,
喔！喔，我以为那是你角色的名字。
Joey: I thought you were like an Indian or something, you know with a ...
我以为你可能是印地安人，你知道的，名字都是……
Leonard: No. Thank you so much for coming in. We appreciate it, thank you.
不，谢谢你过来，我们很感激，谢谢。
Joey: Ah, y-y-you're sure you don't want me to do it again? I could do it you know, with an accent, Leonard: No.
你不要我再演一次吗？我可以加上口音喔。不用了。
Joey: You know, Southern "I could go right now, maaan!"
你知道的，南方的口音 “我可以现在就走，老兄！”怎样？
Leonard: My God in heaven.
我的老天爷啊。
Producer #1: Joey, hang on for a second. Leonard, can we talk to you for a moment?
乔伊，等一下，李奥纳多，我们可以跟你谈一下吗？
Leonard: Yes.
怎样？
Leonard: You, you gotta be kidding. See, h-he, he can't act.
你是在开玩笑吧，他根本不会演戏。
Leonard: Hey! I-I-I don't care he thinks he's hot,
嘿，我不在乎你是不是觉得他很帅，
Leonard: you know. If you wanna sleep with him, do it on your own time. This is a play.
如果你想要跟他上床，随你便，但是这是一场戏剧表演。
Producer #1: No, listen: if you insist on this, I will call my agent so fast on a cell phone connection so clear, he's gonna think I'm next door!
如果你坚持这样，我会马上打电话给我的经纪人，用话质清晰的手机打，让他以为我人就在隔壁！
Joey: Ah, hi, ah. Thank you so much for whispering for my benefit,
嗨，谢谢你这么小声帮我说话。
Joey: but, ah, look, if you just tell me what I did wrong, I would love to work on it and come back and try it again for you.
跟我说我是哪里不好，我会改进，然后再表演一次给你看。
Joey: And-and also: 'How you doing?'
还有，你好吗？
Joey: You should, please, just-just give me another chance. I really wanna get better, please.
再给我一次机会，我真的想要改进，拜托。
Leonard: Well, if you wanna come back at the end of the day today, here are my notes. Ready?
如果你想要明天再回来，这是我的建议，准备好了吗？
Joey: Yeah.
好了
Leonard: Uhm, you're in your head. You-you're thinking way too much.
你在你的脑子里，想太多了。
Joey: I really doubt that.
我真的很怀疑。
Leonard: No, no, no. It's that you're not connected with anything in your body.
不是，你并没有跟你的身体做连结。
Leonard: There's no urgency. The scene is a struggle, uhm, it's-it's a race. Also, what you did was horizontal.
没表达出迫切感，这一幕是很挣扎的。是一种竞赛，还有，你的表演是水平的。
Leonard: Don't be afraid to explore the vertical.
别害怕发掘垂直的情感。
Leonard: And don't learn the words. Let the words learn you.
而且不要体会那些文字，让文字体会你。
Joey: Couldn't I just sleep with the producer?
我不能跟制作人睡一睡就好了吗？
Leonard: I'm gonna blow, blow.
我快不行了，快爆炸了。
Phoebe: Hey, do you wanna go to dinner tonight?
嘿，要不要一起去吃晚餐？
Ross: Oh, I can't. I've-I've got a date with that waitress, that Katy.
不行，我要跟那个女服务生凯蒂约会。
Ross: Yeah, I-I know we've only gone out like twice, but, I don't know, I have a really good feeling about her.
我们只有出去过好像两次，但是我不知道，我对她的印象很不错 .
Phoebe: Oh, I hear divorce bells.
喔，我听到离婚的声音了。
Mugger: Alright. Just give me your wallets and there won't be a problem.
钱包给我，不然你们就惨了。
Ross: What?
什么？
Mugger: I have a gun.
我有枪。
Ross: O-ok. Just just relax, Phoene, just stay calm. Oh my God, I can't find my wallet.
好的，不要怕，菲比 冷静一点。我的天，我找不到钱包！
Mugger: Alright, lady, now give me your purse!
好了，女士，该你把皮包给我了
Phoebe: No.
不要。
Ross: What'd you mean "no"? I knew you'd be my death, Phoebe Buffay.
“不要”？你是什么意思？我就知道我会死在你手上，菲比·布菲！
Phoebe: Lowell, is that you?
罗威，是你吗？
Lowell: Phoebe? Oh my God!
菲比？喔，我的天啊！
Phoebe: Oh, my God!
真不敢相信，我的天啊！
Phoebe: I'm sorry. Ross, this is my old friend, Lowell, from the streets! Lowell, Ross.
我很抱歉，罗斯，这是我 街头的老朋友，罗威-罗威，这位是罗斯。
Lowell: Ross, nice to meet you.
罗斯，很高兴认识你。
Ross: Yeah, a real pleasure.
是啊，真是高兴。
Phoebe: Ah, it's been so long, oh, so long.
真是好久了，哇，真久
Phoebe: I can't believe you're still doing this.
不敢相信你还在干这行。
Lowell: Oh, I know, but I quit smoking!
我知道，但是我戒烟了！
Phoebe: Good for you!
好极了！
Lowell: So you look like you're doing really well!
你看起来好像过得不错！
Lowell: I guess your mugging days are behind you?
我猜抢劫的日子对你而言，已经是过去式了。
Phoebe: Oh.
是啊。
Ross: Oh my God. Phoebe, you used to mug people?
我的天！菲比 你以前会抢劫人？
Phoebe: Excuse me, Ross, old friends catching up.
对不起，罗斯 我们老朋友正在叙旧耶。
Joey: Hey!
嘿！
Monica: Hey, how'd the audition go?
嘿，试镜怎么样？
Joey: Well, they wanna see me again this afternoon, but, err, well, Leonard Hayes did not like me.
唔，他们下午让我再去，但，额，李奥纳多·海斯并不喜欢我。
Monica: What happened?
怎么了？
Joey: Well, he said I wasn't urgent, enough, you know, and that everything I did was horizontal and I should be more vertical.
他说我迫切感不够，我演的是水平的，应该要垂直一点。
Joey: Oh, and he said that I should think less.
他说我应该不要想太多。
Monica: So far so good!
喔，目前为止还不错啊！
Chandler: Honey, I'm old!
亲爱的，我老了！
Monica: I didn't know you were coming home for lunch. Can I get you anything?
我不知道你要回家吃午饭，想要来点什么吗？
Chandler: Sure. A tube of Polident? Some Depends? Birthday wishes from Willard Scott?
当然啰，假牙清洁剂？大人用的纸尿布？维兰德·斯考特唱的生日快乐歌？
Monica: What's wrong?
怎么了？
Chandler: I am so much older than these interns. I can't compete with them.
我比其他的实习生老太多了。我无法跟他们竞争。
Monica: So you're a little older. Try to look at the positive: You have so much life experience.
你是年纪比较大一点没错。往好处想，你有更多的生活经历。
Chandler: Yes, but I don't think life experience is gonna help me, with these.
是的，但是我不认为生活经历可以帮助我这个。
Joey: Wooooooooow! It's like they're on fire!
哇！它们就像着火了！
Monica: What are they?
这些是什么？
Chandler: They're these prototype sneakers that I have to come up with ideas on how to sell them which I can't do because no self-respecting adult would ever wear these.
样品鞋，我需要想出该怎么卖。而我办不到，因为有自尊的成人不会穿这种东西的。
Joey: I'll give you $500 for em!
我给你五百块买下这双！
Chandler: What am I supposed to do with these?
我应该怎么办呢？
Monica: Ah, come on, sneakers are easy. You wear sneakers all the time.
别这样，步鞋很容易啦！你也常常在穿啊。
Chandler: Well, first of all, they're not called "sneakers" anymore.
它们现在不叫做步鞋了。
Chandler: Apparently, they're called "kicks" or "skids" and I think I heard somebody say "slorps".
改叫“溜鞋”或是“滑轮鞋”，我还听到有人说“轮鞋”。
Chandler: And here, look, they got these wheels to pop out from the bottom so you can roll around because, apparently, walking, is too much exercise.
它们底部有轮子突出来，让你可以滑来滑去。因为很显然，走路太耗费体力了。
Chandler: Kids, kids, roll your way to childhood obesity!
“孩子们！孩子们！向前滑到儿童肥胖区吧！”
Monica: Wow, kids today have such an easier time getting fat.
这年头小孩子要变胖可真快啊！
Chandler: Would you help me try to sell these?
你可以帮我卖这些东西吗？
Monica: Ok, have you considered using a girl with huge knockers?
好的，有没有想过用大波霸呢？
Chandler: No, I don't think that's the kinda thing they're looking for.
那不会是他们想要的。
Joey: Hey, that'd work on me! Why do you think I buy Mrs. Butterworth's?
嘿，那对我很有用喔！你想我为什么要买巴特沃斯夫人的产品呢？
Ross: Hey, You'll never guess what just happened.
你不会相信刚刚发生什么事。
Ross: Phoebe and I got mugged!
菲比跟我被抢了！
Monica: Are you okay?
你们没事吧？
Ross: Yeah. because Phoebe knew the mugger.
没事，因为菲比认识那个抢匪。
Monica: How do you know a mugger?
你怎么会认识抢匪呢？
Phoebe: I'm sorry, I have friends outside the six of us.
不好意思，除了我们六个人之外，我还是有其他朋友的。
Ross: You want to know how she knew him? Because Phoebe used to mug people.
你知道他们是怎么认识的吗？因为菲比以前也是在抢劫别人。
Monica: Seriously?
真的吗？
Phoebe: Well, I'm not proud of it, but, you know, sometimes when I was living on the street, I needed money for food and stuff.
我不觉得很光荣，但是你们知道的。当我流落街头的时候，我也需要钱买食物之类的东西。
Monica: Phoebe that is awful.
真是太糟糕了。
Phoebe: Well, okay, I wasn't rich like you guys, okay?
我不像你们那么有钱，好吗？
Phoebe: I didn't eat gold and have a flying pony.
我没有金汤匙也没有飞天马。
Phoebe: I had a hard life. My mother was killed by a drug dealer.
我的生活很苦，我妈被毒贩给杀了
Monica: Your mother killed herself.
你妈是自杀的。
Phoebe: She was a drug dealer.
她自己就是毒贩。
