Joey: Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! None of that, not while you're living under my roof!
不准这样,还住在我屋里,就得守规矩。
Monica: What?
什么?
Joey: Look, just because I know about you two, doesn't mean I like looking at it.
就算我知道内幕,也不代表我喜欢看你们亲热。
Chandler: Aren't you supposed to be at an audition for another hour?
你试镜不是还有一小时才结束?
Joey: Well, I'm sorry if I'm not a middle-aged black woman! And I'm also sorry if sometimes I go to the wrong audition!
很抱歉我不是中年黑人妇女,而且还走错试镜场地。
Joey: Ok, look, if I have to pretend that I don't know about you two, then you two are gonna have to pretendthere's nothing to know about.
你们要我假装不知道,就得假装你们没怎样。
Chandler and Monica: Ok. Sorry. Sorry.
好。抱歉,对不起。
Joey: I can hear that!
我听到了!
Monica: Rachel's at work.
瑞秋还在上班。
Joey: I can still hear you!
我还是听得到。
Phoebe: Hey!
嗨!
Chandler: Hello!
嗨!
Joey: Hey!
嗨!
Monica: Hey, what's that?
那是什么?
Phoebe: Yeah, my mom sent me a family heirloom that once belonged to my grandmother.
我妈寄给我的原属于外婆的祖传宝物。
Phoebe: Can you believe it? ! A year ago I didn't even have a family, and now I have heirlooms for crying out loud.
你们相信吗?一年前我连家人都没有,现在竟然有祖传家产!
Chandler: Well, the heirloom I ever got was a feather boa. Got it from my dad. He got it from his dad. How did I ever get born?
我小时只有一条羽毛围巾,我爷爷传给我老爸再传给我,真不知道我是怎么出生的。
Phoebe: Eeeee- ohh! God!
天啊!
Joey: Argh-argh! Ooh, soft. Is this mink?
好软。这是貂皮吗?
Phoebe: Yeah! Why would my mother send me a fur? Doesn't she know me but at all?
对,我妈为何寄皮草给我?她完全不了解我吗?
Phoebe: Plus, I-I have a perfectly fine coat that no innocent animal suffered to make!
我已经有外套了,而且还没牺牲任何可怜动物。
Chandler: Yeah, just some 9-year-old Filipino kids who worked their fingers bloody for 12 cents an hour. That didn't happen, I made that up!
只不过是时薪12分钱的,九岁菲律宾童工卖命做的。别听我的,我胡说的。
Ross: Hey!
嘿!
Gunther: Oh, Ross? Ross! You can't put up flyers in here.
罗斯,你不能在这里贴广告。
Ross: How come? Everybody else does.
为什么?别人都可以。
Gunther: You can't.
就是你不行。
Monica: What is that?
什么东西?
Ross: Oh, umm, I'm just getting rid of a couple of things.
我要处理掉一些家具。
Monica: This is all of your things.
这可是你的所有家当。
Ross: Yes, yes it is! No, but it's good it's- Emily thinks we should get all new stuff. Stuff that's just ours, together. You know brand new.
没错,没关系,艾蜜莉说我们应该买新家具。光属于我们俩的家具,也就是全新的东西。
Monica: So basically, this is a getting-rid-of-everything-Rachel-ever-touched sale.
基本上这是 “瑞秋碰过家具”大拍卖。
Ross: Touched. Used. Sat on. Slept on.
摸过、用过、坐过、睡过都不行。
Gunther: I'll take it all.
我全买了。
Joey: Hey, Ross, you're ok with that?
罗斯,你不反对?
Ross: Look, if I can just do what Emily wants and get her to New York, I'm sure everything will be fine.
只要顺着艾蜜莉,她来纽约后就没事了。
Chandler: Ok, but don't you think this is a little extreme?
但是这种做法也太极端了吧?
Ross: After what I did? Can you blame her?
毕竟我说错名字,你能怪她吗?
Phoebe: Oh my God! You got off easy! When my friend Silvie's husband said someone else's name in bed, she cursed him and turned his thingy green.
你已经算轻松了。我朋友席薇的老公在床上喊错名字,结果遭到了她最恶毒的诅咒,那玩意都变绿了。
Ross: I guess I'm lucky Emily is not magic.
幸好艾蜜莉不会法术。
Phoebe: Oh, she is. We all are.
她会,我们都会。
Joey: What is he doing? What, Emily thinks Ross's furniture's got Rachel cooties?
他这是做什么?艾蜜莉觉得罗斯的家具,会沾上瑞秋的虱子吗?
Monica: Calm down, Joey.
乔伊,别激动。
Joey: No! Everything's getting all messed up, you know? Emily won't let Ross see Rachel, we're not gonna stop seeing Rachel, hence Ross stops seeing us!
我偏要,事情搞得乱七八糟!艾蜜莉不准罗斯见瑞秋,可是我们会继续见瑞秋,因此罗斯再也不能见我们。
Phoebe: Oh, I hate this. Everything's changing.
我也不开心,一切都变了。
Chandler: Yeah I know, we're losing Ross, Joey said hence...
我知道,我们不能再见罗斯,乔伊还会用“因此”……
Monica: Look, I'm not happy about this either, but, you know if-if Ross says he's happy then, we're just gonna have to keep our feelings about Emily to ourselves. Are you cool with that?
我也不高兴,但是如果罗斯能开心。我们不该说出自己对艾蜜莉的心情,大家愿意吗?
Joey: No! But you know, I'm an actor, I'll act cool. Probably be some of the hardest acting I've ever done. Maybe I'll play it with a mustache.
不要,不过我是演员。我可以装得无所谓,这真是我演过最难的戏,我应该装上假胡须演。
Rachel: Ohh, whoa, God! Storage rooms give me the creeps! Monica, come on please hurry up honey! Please?
天啊,我怕死储藏室了。亲爱的,请快点!
Monica: Rachel, if you want the little round waffles, you gotta have to wait until I find the little waffle iron.
瑞秋,你要吃小圆松饼,就得让我先找到煎盘。
Rachel: I want the little round waffles.
我想吃小圆松饼。
Monica: All right. Op, here it is! Right underneath the can of-of bug bomb. I wonder if the best place to put something that cooks food is underneath the can of a poison?
找到了,就在杀虫药下面。锅碗瓢盆怎么可以放在毒药下面?
Rachel: Ok, you know what? I'll-I'll have toast!
好吧,我吃土司就好了。
Rachel: Arghhhh! !
啊啊啊!
Monica: Oh my God! Fog him! Fog him!
天啊,喷他喷他!
Phoebe: I don't know what I'm gonna do about this coat.
我不知道该如何处置这件皮草。
Joey: I'll take it!
可以给我!
Phoebe: That might work!
好主意!
Joey: Ooh-ooh-ooh, yeah!
哦哈哈哈,真好!
Joey: Enh? All right, what do you think?
怎样?你们觉得如何?
Chandler: You're on in 5 Ms. Minnelli.
五分钟后换你上台,明妮莉小姐。
Ross: No-no-no, it's just a bit sudden. No, it's great. Okay? I'm totally on board. I love you too, all right. Bye.
不……只是有点突然,其实我很高兴,也全力赞成。我也爱你,好,再见。
Joey: What's the matter Ross?
怎么了,罗斯?
Ross: Nothing. No-no, Oh-ah, actually, great news! Um, I just got off the phone with Emily and looks like I'm moving to a new apartment. Woo-hoo!
没事,其实是件好消息。我刚跟艾蜜莉通过电话,看来我要搬家了。
Phoebe: Why?
为什么?
Ross: Well, her thought is, and I agree, fresh new furniture, why not a fresh new apartment?
她认为……而且我也同意,既然要换崭新家具,干脆换间公寓。
Ross: Her cousin has this great place to sublet, it's got a view of the river on one side and Columbia on the other.
她表妹有个地方要分租。一边可以看到河,一边可以看到哥伦比亚。
Joey: That's way uptown! That's like three trains away! Which is great! I love to ride that rail!
那是上城很远的地方,大概要转搭三站火车。太棒了!我喜欢搭火车。
Chandler: So, you're really ok with this?
你真的同意?
Ross: Yes! Yes! I mean it's-it's kind of far from work, but uh, you know, I'll get so much done on the commute. I-I've been given the gift of time!
当然,离上班地点是有点远,但是我路上就有很多时间。她算是送了我一份大礼,那就是时间。
Chandler: Now that's so funny, because last Christmas I got the gift of space. We should get them together and make a continuum.
有意思,上次圣诞节,我得到很多空间。你和我的加起来就有个小宇宙了。
Joey: Now he's moving? Man, what is Emily doing to him? Ow! He's not even here!
现在还要搬家?艾蜜莉到底做了什么?他又不在这里!
Rachel: You guys! You guys!
大家听我们说!
Monica: We were, we were just in the storage area and we saw this really creepy man!
我们刚刚去储藏室,看到一个很可怕的人。
Rachel: It was like this crazy-eyed, hairy beast man! He was like a, like a Bigfoot or a yeti or something!
眼神凶残,全身毛茸茸。就像大脚哈利或喜马拉雅雪人。
Monica: And he, he came at us with an axe, so Rachel had to use a bug bomb on him!
而且他还拿着斧头,瑞秋只好拿杀虫药喷他。
Rachel: Yeah, I-I-I pulled the tab and I just fogged his yeti ass!
我拉开拉环拼命喷他!
Joey: Uhh, like dark hair, bushy beard?
深色头发,满脸胡须?
Rachel: Yeah!
对。
Joey: Yeah, you fogged Danny.
你们喷的是丹尼。
Rachel: Oh! Please! We did not fog Danny! Who's Danny?
拜托,才不是丹尼。丹尼是谁?
Joey: Dan just moved in downstairs. Yeah, he just got back from like this four-month trek in the Andes. Nicefella.
丹尼刚搬到楼下,那家伙去安地斯山四个月,才刚回国,人很好。
Monica: Oh he's nice. He's nice! You know, you always stick up for the people we fog!
什么人很好……每次我们喷谁,你就帮他说话。
Danny: Yeah?
什么事?
Rachel: Hi! You might not remember us, but we are the girls that fogged you.
嗨,你大概不记得,我们就是上次喷你的人。
Monica: We're-we're really sorry we fogged you.
我们很抱歉乱喷一通。
Monica and Rachel: Yeah.
是的。
Danny: Ok.
没事。
Rachel: Hi! Just so you know, we-we didn't mean to fog you, we-we actually thought you were like a yeti or something.
嗨,我们只是要告诉你我们不是故意的,我们以为你是雪人或是怪物。
Danny: Ok.
好。
Danny: Yesss?
什么事?
Rachel: Hi! Sorry you bother you, but I don't think that we can accept your acceptance of our apology, you're just, just doesn't really seem like you mean it.
嗨,抱歉打扰你,但是你接受我们道歉的态度让我们很难接受。听起来一点也不真心。
Monica: Yeah.
对。
Danny: O-kay!
没事。
Monica: Wow! The guy is so rude!
那家伙真恶劣!
Rachel: Really! What is with that guy? I mean you'd forgive me if I fogged you.
没错,他哪里有病?换做我喷你,你早就原谅我了。
Monica: Well you did a little bit.
其实你有喷到一点点。
Rachel: Oh my God, honey, I'm so sorry!
天啊,我很抱歉!
Monica: I totally forgive you!
我完全不介意!
Rachel: Really?
真的?
Monica: Yes.
是的。
Phoebe: Hey!
嘿!
Monica: Hey!
嘿!
Phoebe: So listen, you know my friend Chris who owns the crematorium?
你知道我那个开火葬场的,朋友克里斯吧?
Monica: Crematorium Chris? Sure!
火葬场那个克里斯?当然。
Phoebe: Well, he said, that he would cremate my fur coat for free if I umm, you know, bring in the next person I know who dies.
他说他愿意免费帮我烧皮草,只要我介绍下个要死的朋友去那里火化。
Rachel: Oh my God! Oh my God, look at these pelts!
天啊……好漂亮的皮草!
Monica: Don't get too attached, she's having it cremated.
别太喜欢,她要烧掉了。
Rachel: What? Phoebe, ah-huh, honey, honey I know you're quirky and I get a big kick out of it, we all do, actually...
什么?亲爱的菲比,我知道你很怪,大家平时也欣赏你这点……
Rachel: But if you destroy a coat like this I mean that is like a crime against nature! Not nature, fashion!
但是你毁掉这么棒的皮草,实在是不合天理。说错了,是有违时尚流行!
Phoebe: This is fashion? ! Ok, so to you, death is fashion? ! That's really funny.
这叫做流行?尸体叫做流行?实在有意思。
Phoebe: Here's Phoebe umm, sporting uh, you know, cutting edge hairy carcass from you know, the-the steel traps of wintry Russia.
接下来菲比为各位展示,最新的毛茸茸尸体。这些动物死于寒冷的俄罗斯。
Phoebe: I mean, you really think this looks good? Cause I do!
你们真认为好看?因为我觉得不赖!
Ross: I know, I miss you too. I can't wait to see you. I love you. Bye.
我也想念你,希望快点见到你。我爱你,再见。
Chandler: Ok, what is in here? Rocks?
里面是什么?石头吗?
Ross: No-no, this is my collection of fossil samples.
不,我收集的化石样本。
Chandler: So, rocks.
就是石头嘛。
Ross: I'm really gonna miss this apartment. You know, Ben, Ben took his first steps right over there.
我一定会想念这里,小班就在那边学会走路。
Joey: Ohh. Hey, remember when I ran into this thing and it kinda knocked me out a little?
记不记得我上次撞到这里,还因此昏倒?
Ross: I loved this place! Tell you the truth, I wish I didn't have to move.
我很喜欢这间公寓。老实说,我真希望别搬家。
Joey: Uhh, are you saying that you're not entirely happy about this?
你的意思是你也不想走?
Ross: Well, I mean if uh, if Emily gave me a choice...
如果艾蜜莉给我选择的机会……
Joey: You do have a choice! Aw, Ross, why are you listening to her? ! Are you, are you crazy? !
你本来就有机会。罗斯,你为什么要听她的?你疯了吗?