When she came to that part of the letter in which her family were mentioned, in terms of such mortifying yet merited reproach, her sense of shame was severe. The justice of the charge struck her too forcibly for denial, and the circumstances to which he particularlyalluded, as having passed at the Netherfield ball, and as confirming all his first disapprobation, could not have made a stronger impression on his mind than on hers. The compliment to herself and her sister was not unfelt. It soothed, but it could not console her for the contempt which had been thus self-attracted by the rest of her family; -- and as she considered that Jane's disappointment had in fact been the work of her nearest relations, and reflected how materially the credit of both must be hurt by such impropriety of conduct, she felt depressed beyond any thing she had ever known before.
当她读到他提起她家里人的那一段时,其中措辞固然伤人感情,然而那一番责难却也入情入理,于是她越发觉得惭愧。那真是一针见血的指责,使她否认不得;他特别指出,尼日斐花园建交舞会上的种种情形,是第一次造成他反对这门婚姻的原因──老实说,那种情形固然使他难以忘怀,自己也同样难以忘怀。至于他对她自己和对她姐姐的恭维,她也不是无动于中。她听了很舒服,可是她并没有因此而感到安慰,因为她家里人不争气,招来他的訾议,并不能从恭维中得到补偿。她认为吉英的失望完全是自己的至亲骨肉一手造成的,她又想到,她们两姐妹的优点也一定会因为至亲骨肉的行为失检而受到损害,想到这里,她感到从来没有过的沮丧。
After wandering along the lane for two hours, giving way to every variety of thought; re-considering events, determining probabilities, and reconciling herself, as well as she could, to a change so sudden and so important, fatigue, and a recollection of her long absence made her at length return home; and she entered the house with the wish of appearing cheerful as usual, and the resolution of repressing such reflections as must make her unfit for conversation.
她沿着小路走了两个钟头,前前后后地左思右想,又把好多事情重新考虑了一番,判断一下是否确有其事。这一次突然的变更,实在事关紧要,她得尽量面对事实。她现在觉得疲倦了,又想到出来已久,应该回去了;她希望走进屋子的时候脸色能象平常一样愉快,又决计把那些心思抑制一下,免得跟人家谈起话来态度不自然。
She was immediately told, that the two gentlemen from Rosings had each called during her absence; Mr. Darcy, only for a few minutes to take leave, but that Colonel Fitzwilliam had been sitting with them at least an hour, hoping for her return, and almost resolving to walk after her till she could be found. -- Elizabeth could but just affect concern in missing him; she really rejoiced at it. Colonel Fitzwilliam was no longer an object. She could think only of her letter.
回到屋子里,人家立刻告诉她说,在她出外的当儿,罗新斯的两位先生都来看过她了,达西先生是来辞行的,只待了几分钟就走了,费茨威廉上校却跟她们在一起坐了足足一个钟头,盼望着她回来,几乎想要跑出去找到她才肯罢休。伊丽莎白虽然表面上装出很惋惜的样子,内心里却因为没有见到这位访客而感到万分高兴。她心目中再也没有费茨威廉了,她想到的只有那封信。