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The predicament of this desire to be liked (preferably by everyone) is that despite this desire, we have no control over who will and will not like us.
这种渴望被喜欢（最好是被所有人喜欢）的困境在于，尽管有这种渴望，我们却无法控制谁会喜欢我们，谁不会喜欢我们。
Haters will hate. There's nothing we can do about it. We can get angry at them, argue, or try to change them. But we can also ignore them.
讨厌我们的人会讨厌我们。我们对此无能为力。我们可以对他们生气、争论，或者试图改变他们。但我们也可以忽略他们。
Ignoring people is often the wisest course of action, as it takes the least energy, costs minimal attention, and we don't risk being pulled into an exhausting argument leading to nowhere.
忽略别人往往是最明智的做法，因为它耗费最少的精力和注意力，而且我们不会冒险卷入一场毫无结果的、令人筋疲力尽的争论。
After all, most trolls and haters don't intend to change; they just want to stir the pot.
毕竟，大多数恶棍和讨厌我们的人并不打算改变；他们只是想挑起事端。
Stoic philosopher Epictetus uses an interesting analogy that could help us become more resilient to people's toxicity.
斯多葛派哲学家爱比克泰德使用了一个有趣的比喻，可以帮助我们更好地抵御人们的毒性。
Imagine going to an ancient Roman bathhouse. In such a place, some people tend to splash water, act rudely, and use abusive language.
想象一下去古罗马澡堂，在这样的地方，有些人往往会泼水、行为粗鲁、使用辱骂性语言。
If we go there with the mindset that it's in the 'nature' of this place to encounter such people and that our goal is to keep our heads cool when visiting that place, we'll conclude that we won't attain this goal if we let ourselves be bothered by them.
如果我们带着这样的心态去那里，认为遇到这样的人是这个地方的“天性”，我们的目标是在去那里时保持头脑冷静，我们就会得出结论，如果我们让自己被他们打扰，我们将无法实现这个目标。
Having an online presence, like a YouTube channel, naturally exposes you to trolling and criticism.
拥有像YouTube频道这样的在线平台，自然会让你受到恶意攻击和批评。
It's part of the territory when you put yourself on the internet. Therefore, embracing these people as part of the job builds resilience.
当你把自己放在互联网上时，这就是你所在的地方。因此，把拥抱这些人作为工作的一部分可以增强适应力。
After a while, nasty comments appear like flies, dropping by on a summer day, slightly annoying at most, and unworthy of getting mad about.
过了一段时间，恶意评论像苍蝇一样出现，在夏日里飞来飞去，最多有点烦人，不值得生气。
Attention is a valuable commodity these days. Companies want our attention to promote their products,
如今，注意力是一种宝贵的商品。公司希望我们的注意力来推广他们的产品，
people on social media want our attention to boost their popularity, and television channels want it for advertisement revenue.
社交媒体上的人希望我们的注意力来提升他们的知名度，电视台希望我们的注意力来获得广告收入。
Our employers want our attention (along with our time and energy) to help them make money, of which we generally receive a tiny share.
我们的雇主希望我们的注意力（以及我们的时间和精力）帮助他们赚钱，而我们通常只得到其中很小的一部分。
Human attention means money. And we're wasting most of it.
人的注意力就是金钱。而我们却浪费了很大部分。
We're giving it away to silly TV shows, pointless conversations leading nowhere, looking at people on Instagram we don't even like, and feeling depressed because their lives appear way more successful than ours.
我们把时间浪费在无聊的电视节目、毫无意义的对话、在Instagram上看我们甚至不喜欢的人，并因为他们的生活看起来比我们成功得多而感到沮丧。
The more we give away our attention to others, the less of it we can spend on things that truly matter to us.
我们越是把注意力放在别人身上，就越少能把注意力放在真正重要的事情上。
What about our dreams and ambitions? What about our creative pursuits? These things require dedication.
我们自己的梦想和抱负呢？我们的创造性追求呢？这些事情需要专注。
They need us to isolate ourselves from people, at least for a while, so that we can give them our undivided attention.
它们需要我们与人隔离，至少隔离一段时间，这样我们才能全身心投入其中。
When building up this channel in 2019, I shut myself off from people, online and offline, most of the day.
在2019年建立这个频道时，我大部分时间都把自己与线上线下的人隔离开来。
I didn't want anyone to interfere with my work, as every interaction would affect my focus.
我不想让任何人干扰我的工作，因为每次互动都会影响我的注意力。
Also, I refused to listen to the skeptics, even though their doubts probably came from a good place.
此外，我拒绝听取怀疑论者的意见，尽管他们的怀疑可能出于好意。
So, during bouts of isolation from human distraction and opinion, I was able to create something I'd consider successful.
因此，在与人类干扰和意见隔离的时期，我能够创造出我认为成功的东西。
But I'm not the only one who harnessed the power of ignoring people to boost one's creative pursuits.
但我并不是唯一一个利用忽视他人的力量来促进创造性追求的人。
History is filled with individuals like J. K. Rowling, who secluded herself in cafes to write the Harry Potter series,
历史上有很多像J.K.罗琳这样的人，她把自己关在咖啡馆里创作了《哈利波特》系列，
and Nikola Tesla, who worked in isolation to invent and discover groundbreaking technologies.
还有尼古拉·特斯拉，他独自工作，发明和发现了突破性的技术。
And let's not forget Noah, who ignored the skeptics and finished his godly task.
我们不要忘记诺亚，他无视怀疑论者，完成了他的神圣任务。
As I mentioned, social media is generally a superficial way of relating to others.
正如我所提到的，社交媒体通常是一种与他人建立联系的肤浅方式。
One can have thousands of followers and connections but not even one meaningful friendship.
一个人可以有成千上万的追随者和联系，但却没有一段有意义的友谊。
We also encounter that people have many superficial 'offline' relationships but not any with depth and significance.
我们也遇到过这样的情况：人们有很多肤浅的“线下”关系，但没有一段有深度和有意义的关系。
They've scattered their attention to the many instead of focusing on a selected few.
他们把注意力分散到许多人身上，而不是专注于少数人。
Such diversification works well with things like investing, but is it really beneficial when it comes to socializing? Of course, it depends on what we seek.
这种多元化在投资等方面效果很好，但在社交方面真的有益吗？当然，这取决于我们追求什么。
It's OK if we're content with many shallow friendships and acquaintances who perhaps just serve as means for small talk or benefit our reputation on social media.
如果我们满足于许多肤浅的友谊和熟人，这些朋友可能只是为了闲聊，或是为了在社交媒体上提高我们的声誉，那就没问题了。
Perhaps the sole purpose of having a spouse is to show her off or use him for his money, which, I guess, is also okay with mutual consent.
也许拥有配偶的唯一目的就是炫耀她或利用他的钱财，我想，在双方同意的情况下，这也是可以接受的。
Imagine the loneliness of knowing so many people, calling many of them 'friends,' being married to a trophy wife or husband, yet finding oneself without a genuine confidant during challenging times.
想象一下，认识这么多人，称他们中的许多人为“朋友”，娶一个花瓶妻子或嫁给一个花瓶丈夫，却在困难时期发现自己没有真正的知己，那该有多孤独。
However, one philosopher, Arthur Schopenhauer, actually encouraged keeping people at a safe distance.
然而，哲学家阿图尔·叔本华实际上鼓励与人保持安全距离。
He was a pessimist who compared human relationships with hedgehogs; if we get too close, we may enjoy each other's warmth, but we also sting each other with our sharp spines.
他是一个悲观主义者，他把人类的关系比作刺猬；如果我们离得太近，我们可能会享受彼此的温暖，但我们也会用尖刺刺伤对方。
While there's truth in his analogy, close relationships can be very rewarding.
虽然他的比喻是有道理的，但亲密的关系可以非常有益。
If we intend to create deeper bonds with people, relationships that involve trust, companionship, tolerance, mutual acceptance, and growth, we must be selective.
如果我们想与人建立更深层次的联系，建立信任、陪伴、宽容、相互接受和成长的关系，我们必须有所选择。
Building meaningful bonds is nearly impossible if we want to befriend everyone.
如果我们想和每个人都交朋友，那么建立有意义的联系几乎是不可能的。
We wouldn't have enough time and attention to pour into these close relationships. So, what's the solution? Ignoring people. Ignoring the many allows us to come close to the few.
我们没有足够的时间和注意力投入到这些亲密关系中。那么，解决办法是什么呢？无视他人。无视多数人可以让我们接近少数人。
So, to conclude, ignoring people may not always be the friendliest approach, but ultimately, it's our right to be selective in whom we communicate with and give our attention to.
总而言之，无视他人可能并不总是最友好的方式，但最终我们有权选择与谁交流并关注谁。
Our attention is precious. How we use it significantly determines our quality of life and feelings.
我们的注意力是宝贵的。我们如何使用它在很大程度上决定了我们的生活质量和感受。
Therefore, let's not hesitate to turn off our phones, leave emails and texts unanswered for a while, ignore the lure of social media influencers, and, in essence, choose not to give our attention to everyone asking for it.
因此，让我们毫不犹豫地关掉手机，暂时不回复电子邮件和短信，忽略社交媒体名人的诱惑，本质上，选择不关注每个要求关注的人。
After all, you know what they say: "Ignorance is bliss." Thank you for watching.
毕竟，你知道人们会说“无知是福。”谢谢你的观看。
