评论
打印
You suck at cooking, yeah you totally suck.
你的厨艺弱爆了，完全弱爆了。
Shepherd's pie, also known as English lasagna or potatoes on chili, is a hot layered savory stacked stew you can have for dinner.
牧羊人派，也被称为英式千层面或土豆辣椒酱，是一种热腾腾的分层炖肉，很适合作晚餐。
While shepherd's pie is a delicious meal, shepherd's π is the formula used to calculate the circumference of sheep.
牧羊人派是一种美味的食物，而牧羊人π是用来计算绵羊周长的公式。
We're going to start by dicing this giant ass onion finely.
首先把这个巨大的洋葱切成小碎丁。
You don't need an onion this big, but also YOLO.
洋葱不一定要这么大，但你只活一次。（YOLO: You Only Live Once）
The carrot, also known as the ground dagger, is the original pendulum which can tell you whether or not you should do something.
胡萝卜，也被称为地里长出来的匕首，是最原始的钟摆，可以告诉你是否应该做某件事。
Should I invest in bitcoin? Looks like a yes.
我应该投资比特币吗？它好像说应该投资。
So we'll obliterate a carrot or two with a food smithereener.
用刮板把一个或两个胡萝卜刮碎。
And we will "alliterate" some good gracious gosh darn golly good garlic.
然后再用刮板刮一些大蒜。（alliterate指压头韵的，与obliterate读音相近。）
Put some olive grease in the pan.
在锅里放些橄榄油。
Add in the onion, add in the carrot, wanjangle this on medium for a couple minutes until the onion is softened.
加入洋葱，加入胡萝卜，用中火翻炒几分钟，直到洋葱变软。
Then get that garlic in there.
然后把大蒜放进去。
Then I'm going to shepherd the veggies into a ring of fire and add in the beef.
然后把这些菜摆成一个火圈的样子，再加入牛肉。
Now English shepherd's pie is made with lamb, but if you're eating the lamb, were you actually being a good shepherd?
英国的牧羊人派是用羊肉做的，但如果你吃羊，你真的是一个好牧羊人吗？
I don't think so.
我不觉得。
Add in some flavor enhancing crystals, aka salt, and some pepper pepper pepper.
加入一些增味晶体，也就是盐，还有胡椒胡椒胡椒。
We'll let that brown and break it up with the veggies on the edges watching jealously from the sidelines.
把肉煎成棕色，并且把肉捣碎，让边上的蔬菜只能在一旁羡慕嫉妒恨地看着。
And once that's pretty brown, we can have it rejoin the flock.
肉变成棕色后，就可以让蔬菜重新进入羊群，不，羊肉了。
Now we'll add in a tin of tomato glue, a tablespoon of Worcestershire sauce, a tablespoon of red wine "vinegar-stershire" sauce, and the classic flavors of rosemary, and a pinch of thyme.
现在加入一罐番茄胶水，一汤匙伍斯特郡辣酱油，一汤匙某某郡红酒醋，经典迷迭香，以及一小撮百里香。
If you soak these two herbs together in water, you get shepherd's cologne.
把迷迭香和百里香一起浸入水中，就有了牧羊人古龙水。
I like using the dry stuff because whenever I buy a fresh herb, I use it once and then it just rots.
我喜欢用干的香草，因为每次买新鲜的香草只会用一次，剩下的就会烂掉。
So don't sleep on dead herbs. Dead herbs are awesome.
所以不要犹豫要不要买干香草。干香草超棒。
Wanjangle this completely and then add in a cup of broth.
把这些搅拌均匀，然后加入一杯高汤。
This is veggie broth, but you can use beef broth, chicken broth; barguest or grindylow broth went in season.
我用的是蔬菜汤，但你也可以用牛肉汤、鸡汤，犬魔汤和格林迪洛水怪汤也不错。（barguest和grindylow都是英国神话中的妖怪。）
Now head outside into the wilderness and harvest a naturally occurring peacicle.
现在，走进荒野，采摘一根自然生长的绿豆冰。
Now I'm going to dethaw my pesicle and then throw those in there.
把绿豆冰解冻，然后扔进锅里。
And then I'll pop out the apple corn and add some of that in there.
然后开一个玉米苹果，再加入一些玉米。
Then we'll wanjangle that together until we get shepherd's slop.
然后翻炒翻炒，越来越像牧羊人的泔水了。
Come to think of it, this would make an amazing sloppy Joe, aka the sloppy shepherd.
忽然想到，这也很适合做一个邋遢乔三明治，也可以叫邋遢牧羊人三明治。
Nobody likes peeling potatoes unless you're some sort of masochist.
没人喜欢削土豆，除非你是受虐狂。
Whoa, look at that one. It's like a jug of potato moonshine.
哇，看看这个土豆。很像一罐私酿酒。
One of my two favorite shines.
我最喜欢的两种私酿酒之一。
Instead of peeling the potatoes, what you can do is put a slice around the center, grip it firmly and then...just leave those skins on because potassium is good for you.
除了削土豆，还可以在中间切一下，然后紧紧捏住土豆，然后......算了，不去皮也挺好，因为土豆皮有营养。（potassium是钾，和potato拼写相似。）
We'll punch these into somewhat even geometrical chunks.
把土豆一拳打成形状相同的几何块。
Then we'll make an ocean hot tub and put...
然后做一个海洋热水浴缸，然后放......
Whoa don't do that, also don't do this, also use a bigger pot, also don't fill it so high, also we'll ladle some of that out of there.
哇，别这样放，也别这样放，应该用大一点的锅，水不要加这么多，把水舀出来一些。
But aside from that it's perfect and awesome, and we'll cook these until fork o'clock because the fork is the ultimate determiner of doneness.
除此之外，煮土豆这一步完成得很好，然后用叉子计时，把土豆煮一会儿，因为叉子是衡量土豆有没有熟的最终标准。
We'll drain these and throw them back in the empty hot tub.
把土豆的水沥干，然后倒回空的浴缸里。
Then we'll add a chunk of salted butter and some milk or cream.
然后加入一大块咸黄油和一些牛奶或奶油。
Give those a good fanjangling and then we'll add in some grana padano, which is just bootleg parmesan, and a bit of garlic powder, and manjangle until you've got fluffy starch clouds.
好好搅拌一下，然后加入一些格拉纳帕达诺奶酪，这种奶酪相当于私造的帕尔马干酪，再加入一点大蒜粉，然后搅拌成蓬松的淀粉云朵状态。
Now we'll take out a baking dish and put the slop downstairs.
现在拿出一个烤盘，把牧羊人的泔水倒进去。
And then we'll put on a layer of starch frosting up top.
然后在上面涂一层淀粉糖霜。
Add on some more dairy sprinkles.
再撒一些干酪碎。
Undoes on 370 fundo, and we'll put that in for around 20 to 30 minutes until the top starts to brown.
烤箱370度，放进去烤大约20到30分钟，直到顶部开始变成焦褐色。
And once you've got this nice golden crust, you can let this cool off for a bit before serving.
烤出了这种金灿灿的外壳后，让它冷却一下，就可以端上桌了。
And this should be enough for four shepherds or two sheep depending on the circumference of your sheep.
这样的一份派够四个牧羊人或两只羊吃了，具体要看羊的周长有多长。
