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This shift of delaying our needs into the unhealthy without knowing it is where a lot of us find ourselves unknowingly stuck today.
在不知不觉的情况下延迟满足我们的需求，进入不健康的状态，就是我们许多人今天发现自己无意间陷入困境的原因。
Somewhere in our lives we learned and adapted that repressing or sacrificing our needs for others was beneficial.
在生活中的某个时刻，我们学会了抑制或牺牲自己对他人的需求，并对此习以为常，这本是件好事。
But that became so auto-piloted in our subconscious that it goes past the point of diminishing returns and becomes unhealthy.
但这在我们的潜意识中变得过于习以为常，以至于弊大于利，变得不再健康。
To where maybe we land into a workplace and we hear "we're like family" and our brain just triggers into "give it everything no matter what."
当我们进入工作场所，听到“我们是一家人”，我们的大脑就会切换成“赴汤蹈火奉献一切”的模式。
We sacrifice our boundaries, our time, our relationships, and we start living life in these big swings of overworking to burnout.
我们牺牲了自己的边界、时间和人际关系，在过度加班中精疲力竭。
And maybe we rationally know that it's not the healthiest pattern in our life, but we feel stuck.
也许我们的理性明白，这不是一种健康的生活方式，但我们感觉自己被困住了。
I get that.
我明白这种感觉。
I've lived through that and sometimes still feel challenged with it.
我也有过这种体验，有时仍会受此困扰。
You see, before I worked in mental wellness, you could argue that I worked in the opposite of mental wellness.
在进入心理健康领域之前，我的工作可以说与心理健康完全不搭边。
I started my career in management and technology consulting, spending almost a decade giving it my all.
我毕业后就职于管理和科技咨询行业，用近十年的时间扑在这个领域里。
I did the 80 to 100 hour billing weeks, the 100-plus fights a year, for years on end, the early promotion chase and didn't scale back on other parts of my life either.
我每周工作80至100小时，每年100多场官司，长年累月不停歇，提前晋升紧随其后，而我也没有放下我生活的其他部分。
Still volunteered, went to my SoulCycle classes did brunch and late nights with my friends until my completely overscoped life turned into burnout cycle after burnout cycle.
我当志愿者，参加SoulCycle精品单车健身课，和我的朋友们一起从早聚到晚，直到我过度忙碌密集的生活进入了一个又一个精疲力竭的循环。
In 2017, my brain and body hit a wall.
2017年，我的大脑和身体突然宕机。
I started struggling with debilitating, chronic migraines that, for me, meant that after months of no change and no medication or treatment working, I knew I had to take at least a leave from work.
我开始与虚弱的身体和慢性偏头痛作斗争，但几个月来身体没有出现任何改善，药物和治疗都没有奏效，对我来说，我知道我至少得离开一段时间工作岗位了。
And that was devastating for me because work had really become my everything.
这对我来说是个毁灭性的打击，因为工作真的就是我的一切。
There is a memory that haunts me from that time.
从那时起，有一段记忆一直萦绕在我的脑海中。
And it was the night before I was about to go on leave, and I was just grabbing dinner with a friend and my husband.
那是我要去休假的前一天晚上，我正在和一位朋友和我的丈夫一起吃晚饭。
And I said to my friend, "Work is my entire worth and my identity.
我对我的朋友说：“工作是我的全部价值，是我的一切。
I don't know what I'm going to do without it."
没有它我不知道该怎么办。”
And my husband's body language and face dropped in a way that I had never seen it.
我丈夫的肢体语言和面部表情显示出一种我从未见过的失望。
And after my friend left, I remember him saying to me, "I can't believe that you think that work is your only worth when I see so much more.
在我的朋友离开后，我记得他对我说：“我不敢相信，你居然认为工作是你唯一的价值，在我眼里你的价值根本不止于此。
And I can't believe you can't see that either."
我不敢相信你自己居然没有发现。”
It's a poignant memory for me because I remember it feeling so true.
这段回忆让我印象太过深刻，因为我当时感觉很受伤。
And now I know it's not.
而现在我知道，事实并非如此。
But it was a really rough period.
但那是一段非常艰难的时期。
It's such an important one in my life because it gave me the opportunity to do my own mental health work and understand where these burnout behaviors had come from for me, so that now I could grow into being able to discern when those behaviors are healthy or unhealthy.
这是我人生中十分重要的一段时期，因为它让我有机会处理自己的心理健康问题，并弄清楚为什么我会筋疲力尽，这样我就可以逐渐分辨哪些行为是健康或者不健康的。
For me, where those behaviors started and were adopted is that I grew up learning that I needed to be perfect and to people please and be the best at everything so that I could get myself out of a situation that I felt like I otherwise wouldn't be able to make it through.
对我来说，我产生的这些行为，源于我成长过程中被灌输的“必须做到完美”的思想，我要取悦他人，在任何事情上都要做到最好，这样我才能摆脱自己觉得可能无法解决的情况。
