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Hi everyone, and welcome back to Happy Hour. 欢迎回来酒馆Halloween Special.

Now I know some of you are not really a big fan of the Horror Genre like me, but don't switch off yet, I promise you I will not scare you in this episode.

And you remember last Halloween Special, we focused on all these stupid things people do in the horror films? think of today's episode as a sequel to that. So the Happy Hour Presents your survival guide in horror movies and TV shows.

How many times have you screamed at the TV while watching a horror film？Yelling things like don't go down there you idiot, sell the house. Perhaps a lot of you think that if you were ever in that situation, you would definitely not be that stupid.

平时我们经常开玩笑说, 如果我们在宫斗剧里能够活到第几集; 但是咱们今天升级一下难度, 看看在恐怖剧集里你能活多久.

The thing is we might think we can easily outsmart these dumb-dumbs in horror flicks. But the fact is even if you are the fastest the strongest or even the smartest, in the world of horror movies, no one is safe.

In fact, your chances of survival are pretty low.

One wrong move could mean a horrifying death. The good news is we've got the know-how to help you out. In the horror thriller genre, there a lot of conventions, well, cliches.

其实像我这种 “阅片无数” 的狂热爱好者, 早已经摸透了恐怖惊悚片的套路, there’re many tropes and cliches, today, you're going to learn how to survive in a horror flick.

Rule No.1, be a good person, but not too good.

I know that sounds a little contradictory, but it's going to help you make it out of this with your life, your sanity, and all your body parts still intact.

恐怖片看多了, 多半都能看出每个人的人设, and horror movies love to punish jerks, bad people.

So if you're the mean cheerleader or the obnoxious jock, so if you're like the sexy but mean type, like to bully other people, then your days are numbered.

Rude characters are usually killed off early; and the meaner you are, the more spectacularly brutal your death will be.

Audiences just love to see jerks get what they deserve. So if you're mean, you know you're not gonna make it out alive. It's better to be the kind-hearted leading man or woman, because statistically you stand a much greater chance of surviving a night of terror.

But here's the thing. You don't wanna be too nice or too good, because then you tend to do some pretty stupid things like helping the stranger by the roadside, taking in a poor little girl who’s looking for her mommy.

Just remembered a phrase, No good deed goes unpunished. 恐怖片里做好事不一定有好报, 所以第一条铁律 “做好人, 但千万别要做没有底线的傻好人.”

That would significantly improve your chance of survival.

Survival Rule No.2, don't investigate.

What was that strange noise out in the woods？I'd better go check it out, alone.

What？That's the dumbest thing you could possibly do. Don't go into barns, basements, graveyards, ancient burial grounds, abandoned asylum, abandoned school, abandoned hospital, abandoned everything.

They are abandoned for a reason, just don't go into them; because this is guaranteed a way to get you into some really sticky bloody situation.

But if you still can't resist a temptation to investigate, then remember two things.

Number one, don't ever split up with your friends. 可如果你的好奇心过于旺盛, 你非要去investigate,那么就记住不要split up with your friends, 不要跟你的朋友分开.

If your friends so much as suggest splitting up, you should tell them to ‘shut up’, because you know the minute you guys split up, you will face your final scene;

And Number two, when you go for a quick investigation, don't ever say I'll be right back. No, you won't be right back. You will be bloody and hanging from the garage door, you know that.

所以第二条铁律, 事出反常必有妖, 千万不要好奇心过剩, 什么事都想一探究竟.

Rule No.3, turn around because who or whatever it is that frightens you, it's always behind you.

While hiding from deranged knife-wielding thing of evil, you might ask yourself, where is it？The answer, right behind you.

不管是神鬼妖狐还是杀人魔, 只要你找不到他, 他一定就站在你身后. Learn from those who have gone before you.

Oh, that reminds me bathroom mirrors, just don’t.

Do not open and close the mirror cabinet, do not bend down to wash your face and then come back up again, do not stand in front of the mirror and say anything 3 times in a row.

Because whatever you afraid of, they're gonna appear in that mirror, and you know it.

And speaking of bathrooms, it’s perhaps safer, just not to take a shower or a bath if you're in a horror film.

I don't know about you, but I'd rather be stinky than dead.

Survival Rule No.4, when you move into a new house.

Now this is such a cliche. There are so many things you need to watch out for. When you are moving into a new house, what are your renting or buying.

First things first, if it's much cheaper than normal, just don't do it. You're not that lucky to just happen to stumble upon the only best deal in the market.

You also have to check the house's record and check the blueprints for the new house and see if there any hidden passage ways, basements, any of those situations, so that you can avoid any nasty surprises.

And once you moved in, you find strange things going around your house, you think the house might be haunted, 如果你觉得搬进去的新房闹鬼的话, just move out.

Don't quibble, don't say let's stay in for a while, don't question your partner, your children, just get the hell out of there.

We've seen too many families for whatever reason, they just can't seem to give up on the haunted house, just sell the house and take the loss.

After all, survival is your top priority, is it not?

Rule No.5, keep your pants on.

Okay, I understand that you are madly in love with your boyfriend, or your girlfriend, your newly wedded husband or wife, but keep it in your pants for just a second, now is really not the time.

For some reason, sex in a horror film usually guarantees death, especially in teen horror films, those who couple up for a sexy moment or two usually end up losing more than their shirts.

If you want to up your odds for survival, keep your virginity intact and your clothes on.

第五条铁律, papapa绝对没有好下场.

Rule No.6, make sure your car is always in perfect working order.

If you're able to escape the masked killer or zombie attacks, remember that cars typically aren't reliable.

First of all, they can be low on gas, low on battery. And second of all, you might also find it very difficult to keep your car key in your hand. And most importantly, before getting in your car, check the back seat, check the trunk, make sure nothing or no one is hiding in there.

第六条铁律, 定期保养你的爱车, 关键时候才不会掉链子.

Rule No.7, don't mess with the supernatural.

If you find a curious looking book written in a language you don't understand, but can sort of sound out. Don't read it out loud.

发现有奇异文字的古书, 别有事没事读着玩了. I don't see you with that kind of curiosity and devotion with English. 平时看你学英语没有那么大劲儿.

If you suspect something or someone is haunted or possessed, don't stick around and trying to make contact with the spirits through any of these psychic tools like Ouija board or plates, pen, pencil, or what have you.

通灵什么的，咱普通选手就别玩了, 行吗？I know you're just curious and thinking maybe they don't want to kill you or control you. Maybe they're just friendly spirits.

Totally understandable. But if you want to survive, perhaps not.

Rule No.8, always listen to the ominous warnings, and always watch out for the bad omens.

Just because someone creeps you out, doesn't mean they're not worth listening to.

恐怖片里经常有那种 “扫地僧”一样的形象, 悠悠地对你说出一些传说和传闻.

Listen to the warnings if you wanna cheat death. And if you start to see some really bad omens, believe in every one of them, don't take your chances.

恐怖片里不信邪,必中邪.

And No.9, don't trust kids and old ladies.

I’d say this again, don't trust kids and old ladies. They're not as innocent and fragile as they look.

And last but not least, Rule No.10, always assume your attacker is still alive.

No, it's never over. Yon know how at the end of many horror films, the one or two main characters finally feel like they can relax because they have just escaped certain deaths because they believe their attacker is gone for good.

But it's never the case, because there will always be sequels.

要想活命, 永远都要做好续集的准备.

Whatever that evil thing is, it is coming back. And that ends our Top Ten Rules in your Horror Flick Survival Guide.

Now I know I cannot cover absolutely everything because there are so many tropes and cliches, and there are constantly new ones, but keep those in mind, you will at least beat all the other characters in the film.

I hope you enjoyed this year's Halloween Special. Leave your comment in our comment section, and tell me what are some of your survival tips in horror flicks？We'll see you next time.