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Hey Psych2Goers.
嘿，Psych2Go的观众们。
Being in a relationship could be one of the most fulfilling experiences to have, especially when both partners are committed, while also prioritizing their individual needs.
谈恋爱可能是最有成就感的经历之一，特别是当双方都很忠诚的时候，同时双方也会优先考虑他们各自的需求。
However, a relationship that consists of one or both partners using the relationship as a way to validate their own self-worth is considered a codependent relationship, not a healthy one.
然而，如果一段关系中一方或双方都把这段关系作为一种验证自我价值的方式，那么这种关系就被认为是相互依存的关系，而不是健康的关系。
Codependency can be tricky to identify, especially when you or your partner are so entrenched that it's difficult to tell what is helpful from detrimental.
相互依赖可能很难识别，特别是当你或你的伴侣很难改变的时候，很难区分什么是有益的，什么是有害的。
To help you recognize the difference, here are five common signs that you might be in a codependent relationship instead of a healthy one.
为了帮助你认识到这一差异，这里有五个常见的迹象，表明你可能处于一段相互依存的关系中，而不是健康的关系中。
Number one, no responsibility for personal feelings.
第一，不对个人感情负责。
While it's inevitable that hurt feelings occur throughout a relationship, how conflicts are resolved can be different across the board, depending on how healthy a relationship is.
虽然在一段关系中不可避免地会出现伤害感情的情况，但冲突的解决方式可能会在各个方面都有所不同，这取决于一段关系的健康程度。
In a healthy relationship, both parties understand and accept that they're responsible for their own feelings and responses to said feelings.
在一段健康的关系中，双方都理解并接受他们对自己的感觉和对这些感觉的反应负责。
Blaming and forcing ultimatums upon the other to change is not a good way to deal with conflict.
指责并强迫对方发出最后通牒来改变，不是处理冲突的好方法。
You may be in a codependent relationship if either partner requires constant reassurance, validation, or approval from the other.
如果任何一方需要对方不断的保证、认可或同意，你可能处于相互依存的关系中。
Take it as a sign of codependency, If you or your partner are unable to feel self-worth on your own.
如果你或你的伴侣自己感觉不到自我价值，那就把它当作相互依赖的标志吧。
Number two, unbalanced giving at personal expense.
第二，个人付出的不平衡。
Traits like compassion, patience, and generosity are all surefire signs of an amazing romantic partner.
同情心、耐心和慷慨等特质都是一个令人惊叹的浪漫伴侣的必备标志。
However, it's not uncommon for people who have warm and thoughtful characteristics to unknowingly find themselves in codependent relationships.
然而，对于具有热情和体贴特征的人来说，不知不觉中发现自己处于相互依存的关系中并不少见。
Partners who continue sacrificing their own needs for the needs of their partner tend to be prideful for living up to their ideals of being a compassionate, patient, and generous partner, while at the same time, feeling depleted, dissatisfied with the relationship, and taken for granted by their partner.
那些为了伴侣的需要而不断牺牲自己的需要的伴侣，往往会为自己成为一个富有同情心、耐心和慷慨的伴侣而感到自豪，但同时，他们会感到失落、对这段关系感到不满，并被伴侣认为是理所当然的。
The need to be constantly prioritizing their partner's needs can be mentally and emotionally toxic.
需要不断地优先考虑伴侣的需求，这在精神上和情感上都是有害的。
If you or your partner fall into habits of pleasing the other at your own expense, find ways to communicate with one another to reach solutions that could benefit both sides.
如果你或你的伴侣养成了以牺牲自己为代价取悦对方的习惯，那就想办法与对方沟通，达成对双方都有利的解决方案。
You deserve to receive as much as you're willing to give.
你愿意付出多少，就应该得到多少。
Number three, boundaries are blurred.
第三，界限变得模糊。
Do you find it hard to say no to your partner?
你觉得很难对你的伴侣说不吗？
Or do you feel responsible for their mental and emotional health at the detriment of your own?
或是你觉得对他们的心理和情绪健康负有责任，而损害了你自己的健康？
If your answer to either of these questions is yes it's possible that you might be in a codependent relationship.
如果你对这两个问题中的任何一个的回答都是肯定的，那么你们可能处于一段相互依存的关系中。
It can be hard to define where your boundary lines are drawn when you bind yourself emotionally to another.
当你在情感上将自己与他人捆绑在一起时，很难确定你的边界线在哪里。
A healthy relationship calls for strong boundaries, even if that means saying no, to the one you love.
一段健康的关系需要清晰的界限，即使这意味着对你爱的人说不。
While a codependent relationship enables both partners into deeper unhealthy patterns when neither are willing to stand their ground.
而当双方都不愿坚持自己的立场时，相互依存的关系会让双方陷入更深层次的不健康模式。
Though, it might be difficult, boundaries have the potential to strengthen a relationship instead of weakening it as someone with codependency believes, might assume.
尽管这可能很困难，但界限有可能加强一种关系，而不是像一些相互依赖的人认为的那样削弱关系。
Number four, not thinking for oneself.
第四，不为自己着想。
A healthy relationship often creates a blending effect for the individuals involved.
一段健康的关系通常会给相关的人带来一种混合的效果。
It's normal for partners to begin behaving, thinking, and even looking similarly, even so, this can be a red flag to look out for when it comes to codependent relationships.
伴侣开始在行为、思考、甚至长相上看起来相似是很正常的，即便如此，当涉及到相互依存的关系时，这可能是一个值得注意的危险信号。
Notice if you or your partner begin parroting one another's thoughts or perspectives.
注意，如果你或你的伴侣开始模仿对方的想法或观点时是危险的。
While it can seem harmless to agree 100% with everything your partner thinks, this pattern can potentially lead towards an eventual, harmful belief that someone else will always know better than you, or worse, that they know what's best for you as an individual.
虽然百分百同意另一半的想法似乎是无害的，但这种模式可能最终会导致一种有害的信念，认为别人永远比你更了解，或者更糟糕，认为他们知道什么对你来说是最好的。
One way to grow out of this behavior is to consider your partner's thoughts against your personal beliefs and perspectives.
摆脱这种行为的一种方法是考虑你伴侣的想法，而不是你的个人信仰和观点。
Try to stay true to yourself.
试着做真实的自己。
It will add to your level of independence and self assurance.
这会增加你的独立性和自信心。
Number five, losing sense of self.
第五，失去自我意识。
Most dangerously of all, a codependent relationship may cause a loss of sense of self.
最危险的是，相互依存的关系可能会导致自我意识的丧失。
People who fall into codependent relationships often do so without realizing that they're looking for someone to validate their identity, but in their search they may have sacrificed too much of themselves.
陷入相互依存关系的人往往没有意识到他们正在寻找一个人来验证自己的身份，但在寻找过程中，他们可能牺牲了太多自己。
To combat this from happening, be sure to prioritize both your needs alongside your partner's and never feel that being in a happy and fulfilling relationship requires you to sacrifice your individualism.
为了防止这种情况的发生，一定要优先考虑你和你伴侣的需求，永远不要觉得在一段幸福和充实的关系中需要你牺牲你的个人主义。
The difference between sacrifice and compromise is considering yourself.
牺牲和妥协的区别在于考虑到你自己。
To think of and consider the wellbeing or benefit of one self while doing the same for another.
考虑和考虑一个人的幸福或利益，同时为另一个人做同样的事情。
Maintain connections to those who supported you even before your relationship began.
与那些在你们开始交往之前就支持你的人保持联系。
Continue nurturing the hobbies or interest you had before your partner entered your life, and find new ones to enjoy together or alone.
继续培养在伴侣进入你的生活之前就已经有的爱好或兴趣，找到新的爱好或兴趣来一起发展或独自享受。
Do you relate to any of these signs?
你有这些迹象吗?
Not all forms of dependency are negative.
并不是所有形式的依赖都是负面的。
While codependent relationships are unhealthy and detrimental.
而相互依存的关系是不健康和有害的。
It's possible to build a relationship on the principles of interdependence, instead.
相反，建立在相互依赖原则上的关系是可能的。
Interdependence calls for both partners to approach the relationship with a balanced sense of self, to support one another towards becoming their best selves in both the relationship, and individual lives.
相互依赖要求双方以一种平衡的自我意识来处理这段关系，支持对方在这段关系和个人生活中成为最好的自己。
Did you find this video insightful?
你觉得这个视频有深刻的见解吗?
If so, don't forget to leave a like and a comment about your own experiences.
如果是这样的话，别忘了给自己的经历点赞和评论。
Share this video with a friend, if you think it'll help them too.
把这段视频分享给朋友，如果你认为这对他们也有帮助的话。
As usual, all references used are in the description.
与往常一样，所有使用的引用都在描述框中。
That's it for now.
今天的节目就到这里了。
