评论
打印
Let's get to the news here. Tonight was President Trump's first State of the Union.
来看看今天的新闻，今晚是小特首发国情咨文的时间。
And I saw that Trump read his speech off a teleprompter.
听说这次小特使用了提词器。
You could tell because he began by saying applause, good evening, applause. Please be seated. They sit.
因为他开始说的是，鼓掌，晚上好，鼓掌，请坐，他们坐下了。
That's right, he read off a prompter. To make sure he stayed on track,
没错，他这回用了提词器，避免小特读串行，
his staff had a little Mickey Mouse head bounce over the words like a sing-along song.
他的工作人员将米奇老鼠的头像放在了文字上，就像跟唱歌曲一样可以一跳一跳的。
But experts said it was a very historic State of the Union.
有专家称这次咨文演讲是历史性的一刻。
You know cause it marked the first time since taking office that Trump went a full hour without tweeting.
因为这是小特上台以来，头一个小时没有发“推特”。
Actually, I heard about a fun drinking game for the speech.
我听说了一个关于这次演讲特别逗的饮酒游戏。
Here's how it works. If you took a shot each time Trump didn't stick to the script, your name is Sarah Huckabee Sanders.
规则是这样的，一旦小特没有按照演讲稿去说，你就要喝酒，你的名字就是萨拉·赫卡比·桑德斯。
That's like....He didn't do it again. Oh, boy. He's gone, going rogue.
就像这样，小特又犯错了，来吧喝，他疯掉了。
I guess most of Trump's State of the Union address was written by his adviser, Stephen Miller,
我猜想这次演讲稿是他的顾问史蒂芬·米勒写的，
while the rest of Trump's presidency was written by Stephen King.
小特其它的演讲稿是史蒂芬·金写的。
Did you see this? This was embarrassing. You see this tickets to the State of the Union had to be reprinted
听说了吗？ 这个太尴尬了，此次演讲的入场票需要重新印刷，
after they originally said State of the Uniom.
之前的票面上写着国情咨翁。
Even the guy who sent that false missile alert in Hawaii was like how do you mess that up? I mean, what?
就连误按导弹警报的夏威夷伙计都要问，这是怎么搞的？ 到底怎么回事？
Tickets to Trump's State of the Union had to be reprinted because of a typo. Check it out. It says State of the Uniom.
因印刷错误，入场票需要重印，来看看到底是怎么写的国情咨翁。
That's not all. There was actually a message from Trump on the back of the ticket as well. Take a look. It said...
还没有完，票后面是小特想要告诉大家的话，来看看。
I Donald J. Trump, invite you to my Stape of the Onion. This will be my first hairdress to Congested,
我特朗普邀请大家来参加我的国庆咨翁演说，这将是我在国吃的第一次演长，
and I'll be speeching on miny imported topix witch I'll read off a telescope. I apreesheate yer serpent.
我会在多个话吃上发表赶场，我会用望远镜进行演讲，希望您来参差。
I don't know like...Wow. After Trump's speech, Massachusetts Congressman Joe Kennedy became one of the youngest people
这是什么玩意，老天，演讲结束后，马塞诸塞州国会议员乔·肯尼迪成为了年龄最小的之一，
to give the Democratic response. And you could tell he was young when all he said was he cray.
他代表民主党做出了回应，你可以看出来他非常年轻，他说他吃了。
But Trump actually did his own livestream on the speech, and this is true.
小特在演讲中还进行了小特直播，这是真的。
If you donated money to his re-election campaign, they put your name on the screen during the speech. Check out some of his donors. Watch this.
如果你在小特的连任竞选中投了钱，那么你的名字将出现在演讲中，来看看都是谁。
Solving these and so many other pressing problems will require us to work past the differences of party.
解决这些棘手问题需要我们撇去两党之间的不同。
It will require us to tap into the American spirit that has overcome every challenge throughout our long and storied history.
需要我们通过美国精神来实现，在历史的长河中，我们通过它解决了所有的挑战。
But to accomplish our goals... Very interesting. You see that?
但为了实现目标，非常有趣，看见了吗？
And this is pretty big. Today Amazon announced it's creating its own healthcare company.
下面这个是个大新闻，亚马逊今天宣布将创建自己的医保公司。
That's kind of awkward, getting healthcare from Amazon.
这可有点尴尬，从亚马逊那里买医保。
Especially when a drone flies over your house and says Viagra for Bob. Viagra for Bob. Is this the right house for Boneless Bob?
尤其是当无人飞机飞到你家上空，叫嚷着鲍勃的威哥药，鲍勃的威哥药，这是鲍勃的家吗？
Finally, I read that Apple is growing its fleet of self-driving cars.
最后，苹果正在发展无人驾驶汽车。
You can tell the self-driving cars are made by Apple cause when you hit a pebble, it shatters the entire windshield.
你一眼就能看出这是苹果出品的，用鹅卵石砸一下，整个挡风玻璃就会破碎。
You guys, we have a great show tonight. Give it up for The Roots!
今晚的节目非常精彩，掌声送给紫根合唱团。
