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From age 15 to 18, I hated myself for becoming the thing that I loathed: a bully.
在15到18岁之间，我憎恨自己，憎恨我变成了我厌恶的样子：一个恃强凌弱的人。
When I was 19, I wrote, "I will love myself despite the ease with which I lean toward the opposite."
19岁的时候，我写道:“我将爱我自己，不去在乎自己是否站在自己讨厌的位置。”
Standing up for yourself doesn't have to mean embracing violence.
自强不息并不表示你需要使用暴力。
When I was a kid, I traded in homework assignments for friendship,
当我还是小孩子的时候，我用我的家庭作业换取友谊，
then gave each friend a late slip for never showing up on time, and in most cases not at all.
然后又通过迟到避开所有的朋友，一般都不会有什么问题。
I gave myself a hall pass to get through each broken promise.
每次爽约我都能立刻原谅自己。
And I remember this plan, born out of frustration from a kid who kept calling me "Yogi,"
有次，一个小孩子让我很沮丧，他一直叫我“修行者”，
then pointed at my tummy and said, "Too many picnic baskets."
指着我的肚子说，“好大的野餐篮子。” 因此我有了一个计划。
Turns out it's not that hard to trick someone,
我发现原来戏弄一个人也不难，
and one day before class, I said, "Yeah, you can copy my homework,"
有一天快上课的时候，我对他说：“嘿，给你抄我的作业，”
and I gave him all the wrong answers that I'd written down the night before.
然后我把自己昨天写好的错误答案递给了他。
He got his paper back expecting a near-perfect score,
他怀着满分的期待去拿作业，却得了0分
and couldn't believe it when he looked across the room at me and held up a zero.
他无法相信，在教室的另一头望着我，做出“零”的手势。
I knew I didn't have to hold up my paper of 28 out of 30,
我知道我不用把自己接近满分的作业举起来给他看，
but my satisfaction was complete when he looked at me, puzzled,
很奇怪，他看着我的时候，我感到很满足，
and I thought to myself, "Smarter than the average bear, motherfucker."
我对自己说，“比一般人聪明嘛，狗娘养的。”
This is who I am. This is how I stand up for myself.
这就是我。这就是我自强的方式。
