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Last night was President Trump's State of the Union address which we all saw on TV.
昨晚是小特的国情咨文演讲，我们都在电视上看了。
But it turns out he did a rehearsal of the speech earlier in the day. And we actually got our hand on the footage. Oh. Yeah.
但结果他当天早间还进行了彩排，我们拿到了彩排的录像，没错。
And it was quite a bit different. But take a look. Thank you, thank you for joining me at my State of Reunion.
看起来很不一样，看看，谢谢，谢谢参加我的国情重聚演讲。
Okay, Mr. President. So, it's State of the Union. Yeah-huh. Yeah, so let's try it again.
对不起，总统先生，是国情咨文，耶耶，所以让我们再来一次。
Thank you for joining me at my Staycation Union. No, it's State of the Union. Again.
谢谢参加我们的居家度假演讲，不是，是国情咨文，再来一次。
Thanks for joining me at my Steak on the Onion. What? To my fellow Americans and my one Russian.
谢谢加入我们的牛排洋葱演讲，啥？向我的美国同胞和一名俄罗斯人讲话。
Nope. Cut. What? First things first, I'm gonna tell you the name of tonight's designated survivor and their precise location.
不是，减掉，啥？第一件事，我想告诉你们今晚指定幸存者的名字和他们的准确方位。
No, please don't tell us that. Okay, I won't, but it is Don Jr., and he's at a Dave & Buster's.
不对，请不要告诉我们这个，好吧，我不会说的，但我说的是小唐，他目前在Dave & Buster's连锁餐厅。
Which tie do you think I should go with? Red? Extra long red? Or Fruit by the Foot? What's up, guys?
你觉得我应该戴哪条领带？红色的？更长一点的红色的？零食糖果“Fruit by the Foot”，咋了朋友们？
It's me, Donald Trump. And you're watching my YouTube channel. Don't forget to subscribe and smash that Like button.
我是小特啊，你们现在在YouTube频道观看我的节目，不要忘记订阅，并点击“喜欢”按钮。
Should we print this on unrippable paper just in case someone tries to tear it up? Uh, no, we don't need to do that.
我是否应该将这个打印在不会撕碎的纸上，万一有人想要撕掉它呢？不，我们不需要这么做。
Okay. We'll see. I'm just glad they started out the caucuses in Ottawa. Oh, it's Iowa. Idaho. Iowa? Ohio.
好吧，我们拭目以待，我们很高兴他们开始了渥太华的党团会议，哦，是爱荷华，爱德华，爱荷华？俄亥俄。
No, I-O-W-A. E-I-E-I-O. That's what I said. Lot of great farmers. I love the caucus and all the caucus-ian people.
不是，是I-O-W-A，E-I-E-I-O，这是我说的，许多著名的农民，我喜欢这个党团会议，所有的党团会议人物。
Usually when Caucasians vote, it goes my way. Cut!. When I say four more, you say years.
当党团会议成员投票时，它就会按我的想法展开，停！当我说另外四个时，你们说年。
Four more. Four more. We'll fix it in post, right? I've made so many achievements. Like this morning,
另外四，另外四，我们将在后期制作时变化一下，我有许多的功绩，比如这个早上，
I did that thing where I got my shoes on without having to undo my laces.
我穿鞋的时候不用解开鞋带。
I just shoved my feet in there and kind of wiggled them around, and eventually, they fit right in.
我只是将脚丫子戳进去，然后在里面扭一扭，最后脚正好放进去了。
I achieved both shoes. What are we doing now? We're gonna practice shaking Nancy Pelosi's hand. Okay. Psych.
我两只脚都是这么干的，我们现在在干嘛？我们将练习和佩洛西握手，好吧，不握了。
And then this part, we put on TikTok, right? Am I doing it right? I'm gonna need a pick-me-up. Someone Coke-Energy me.
下面我们将上抖音，我做的对吗？我需要提精神的东西，请拿可乐来。
Okay, thank you for watching. You can stream my speech on YouTube, Hulu, or the Shadow app. Okay.
谢谢观看，你可以在YouTube、Hulu网站或是影子app上看到我，好吧。
And then I'll do the dance again, right? We'll go back to the dance. Sure.
我要接着跳了，我们接着跳舞，当然。
