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读者文摘:九则引人思考的笑话(2)

时间:2019-08-12 17:05:00 来源:可可英语编辑:hoy 可可英语APP下载 | 可可官方微信:ikekenet

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Four. A doctor walks into the examining room and puts his hand on his patient's shoulder.
一位医生走进检查室，把他的手放在他病人的肩膀上。

"I'm afraid I have some bad news. You're dying, and you don't have much time left." "Oh no!" says the patient.
“恐怕我有一些坏消息。你快死了，你所剩时间已经不多。”这个病人说，“奥，不！”

"How long do I have to live?" "Ten," says the doctor. "Ten?" cries the panicked patient.
“我还能活多长时间？”医生说，“十。”惊慌的病人喊道，“十？”

"Ten what? Days? Weeks? Months?" The doctor calmly replies, "Nine ..."
“多久？十天？十周还是十个月？”医生平静地回答，“九...”

In other words ...Life is short—and getting shorter every day. Might as well grab a Krispy Kreme.
换言之...生命是短暂的，而且一天比一天短。还不如吃点甜甜圈。

Five. "See that kid?" a barber says to his customer during a haircut, pointing to a 12-year-old standing outside the barbershop.
“看到那个小孩了吗？”理发师指着站在理发店外面的一个12岁的小孩对他的顾客说。

"He is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch. I'll prove it to you."
“他是世界上最笨的孩子。看着。我来证明给你看。”

The barber takes out a one-dollar bill and a five-dollar bill, then calls the boy inside.
理发师拿出一张一美元的钞票和一张五美元的钞票，然后把男孩叫了进去。

He holds out both bills and asks, "Which one do you want?" The kid takes the one-dollar bill and leaves the shop.
他拿出两张钞票，问道：“你想要哪一张？”孩子拿着一美元离开了商店。

"See?" the barber says, laughing. "The dumbest kid in the world."
“看见了吗？”理发师笑着说。“世界上最傻的孩子。”

The customer leaves the barber-shop and spots the boy coming out of an ice cream store.
顾客离开理发店，看见一个男孩从一家冰淇淋店出来。

He says, "If you don't mind my asking, son, why didn't you take the five-dollar bill?"
他说：“如果你不介意我问的话，孩子，你为什么不拿那5美元呢？”

The boy takes a lick of his ice creamcone and says, "Because the day I choose the five, the game is over."
小男孩舔了舔冰淇淋，说：“因为我选五美元的那天，游戏就结束了。”

In other words...A fool and his money are soon parted. Just be sure you know which one of you is the fool.
换言之...傻瓜和他的钱很快就会分开。只是要确定你们中谁是傻瓜。

Six. It was the morning of Black Friday, and there was a big sale at the electronics superstore.
那是黑色星期五的早晨，电子产品超级市场正在大减价。

People lined up outside at 5 a.m. At about 7:30, there was a huge commotion when a short guy in khaki pants tried working his way to the front of the line.
早上5点，人们在外面排队。七点半左右，一个穿卡其裤的小个子男人试图挤到队伍的最前面，引起了一阵巨大的骚动。

He didn't get very far before the mob grabbed him, wrestled him out of line, and threw him into the parking lot.
他没走多远，就被民众抓住了，把他从队伍里拽了出来，扔进了停车场。

The little guy got up, brushed himself off, and tried again.
这个小个子站了起来，掸了掸身上的灰尘，又试了一次。

He was barely able to take another step before an even bigger mob attacked him and threw him out of the line again.
他几乎没能再走一步，就有一群更大的民众攻击了他，把他扔出了队伍。

Undeterred, the guy got up and started limping toward the front of the line a third time.
这家伙毫不气馁，站起身来，第三次一瘸一拐地朝队伍前面走去。

"Are you nuts?" asked one of the red-faced mob members. "Don't you know you're just gonna get tossed out of line again?"
“你疯了吗？”一个红着脸的民众问道。“你不知道你又要被赶出队伍了吗？”

"Yeah, I know," the man replied. "But if you don't let me get to the front of the line, I'll never be able to open the store."
这个男人回答，“是的，我知道。“但是如果你们不让我去到队伍的前面，我将永远没法开店。”

In other words ...Your mother was right: Just because everyone else is doing it doesn't mean you should be too.
换言之...你母亲是对的：仅仅因为其他人都在这么做，并不意味着你也应该这么做。

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1.might as well只好；不妨
There's nothing I can do about the problem, so I might as well go with the flow.
关于这个问题我无能为力，所以我不如就顺其自然好了^4+,F1u^VsA。
2.line up列队；对齐
The senior leaders lined up behind him in orderly rows...
高级将领整齐有序地在他身后站成几排O883CyYQkl&lk%O。
3.toss out扔掉；丢弃
You should toss out all those old magazines.
你应该把那些旧杂志都处理掉Y_NJ|GIBH+nimY。

译文由可可原创，仅供学习交流使用，未经许可请勿转载[^(_nmR-H_!#cLxNqp。

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重点单词		查看全部解释
orderly	['ɔ:dəli]	想一想再看 adj. 有秩序的，整齐的，一丝不苟的，和平的
senior	['si:njə]	想一想再看 adj. 年长的，高级的，资深的，地位较高的	联想记忆 X 单词senior 联想记忆： sen年老+ior表形容词，“较…的”→年长的
commotion	[kə'məuʃən]	想一想再看 n. 骚动，暴乱，喧闹	联想记忆 X 单词commotion 联想记忆： com共同，motion（n 运动）－共同运动－动乱
toss	[tɔs]	想一想再看 n. 投掷，震荡 v. 投掷，摇荡，辗转	联想记忆 X 单词toss 联想记忆：美语发音：他死－因为被漫不经心地扔了。
shoulder	['ʃəuldə]	想一想再看 n. 肩膀，肩部 v. 扛，肩负，承担，(用肩