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Since they met five years ago, life has changed Rowan Martin and John Hornsby. It has also changed their relationship. In frank letters to each other, they describe the gains - and the losses.
自五年前相遇后，罗恩·马丁和约翰·霍恩斯比的生活就发生了变化。俩人的关系也发生了变化。他们在信中彼此坦言，描述了各自的得失。
Dear John
亲爱的约翰
I thought having a family would bring us closer together. Five years and two kids later, I sometimes feel like nothing could have driven us apart. In the beginning, we talked eagerly and innocently about maintaining two careers and parenting equally. It hasn't played out like that. Lack of flexible work and affordable childcare has forced us into two distinct and separate roles. Most of the time, I look after the kids and you pay the bills.
我原以为组建家庭会让我们走的更近。五年过去且有了两个孩子之后，我有时会觉得没什么能让我们分开（事实已经分开了）。开始时，我们急切而又天真的讨论着两个人同时上班，一起教育孩子。但事实并非如此。工作的不灵活性和支付不起的托管迫使我们俩分别扮演着截然不同的角色。大多数时候，我照顾孩子们，而你负责买单。
So when I'm wrangling with a trolley laden down with our wilful offspring or scraping diarrhoea off a sheepskin rug, it is easy to resent you for the freedom I imagine you enjoy out there in the world of reasonable adults and measurable goals. The burden of domestic drudgery and the intense pressure of meeting our children's unending needs and incessant demands often blinds me to the fact that you carry the equal burden of keeping a roof over our heads, clothes on our backs.
所以当我们任性的孩子们坐在小推车上，我与他们争吵时或者我刮去羊皮地毯上的腹泻物时，我很容易就会憎恨你，因为我以为你正在外面的世界享受自由，外面的世界充满着理智的成年人和可衡量的目标。家里的杂活和满足孩子们无止境的、不断的需求让我倍感压力，通常会蒙蔽我看清事实：你也承受着相同的负担，需要供房，还需要确保我们有衣服穿。
Though I spend a lot of time lying in the gutter with the kids, we do occasionally look up at the stars. Sharing with you the funny, bizarre and sweet words that tumble from their mouths should be something I do religiously.
虽然我很多时间都和孩子们生活，庸庸碌碌，但我们也会偶尔抬头仰望清凉如水的天空。我会真诚的与你分享孩子们说出的有趣、异想天开而又甜蜜的话语。
Hilarious or disastrous, you miss so much, and my heart breaks for you. But I miss nothing - when they are hurt, hungry, tired, scared or sad, when they wake in the night, again and again, it is so often me they call out for.
不管欢乐还是灾难，你错过的太多太多，我的心都为你而碎。但我什么都没错过--当孩子们受伤、饥饿、疲劳、担心、伤心或者夜里一次又一次的醒来时，他们叫的通常是我。
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