5.Dating Has Become Too Casual

"The new date is 'hanging out'" Hewitt told The New York Times. She recalled a guy friend validating her sentiment by saying: "I don't like to take girls out. I like to have them join in on what I'm doing — going to an event, a concert." Indeed "hanging out" has now become synonymous with actual dating. With all pre-dating conversation going exclusively to the nonchalance of text, apps, and dating websites, it's hard to decipher whether a relationship is even romantic or not. Whereas several decades ago finding someone to marry sought after with urgency (a staple of a different time that wasn't necessarily a positive one), we have now gone to the completely opposite end of the spectrum, where too many options may keep us from finding someone to share our lives with.

4.Potential Companions Know Too Much About Your Past Before Meeting You In The Present

A staple of healthy relationships is taking time to get to know each other and establishing a foundation of trust before revealing your past secrets and vulnerabilities. In the age of social media and ever-evolving technology, a potential date or suitor can glean a roster of information on you before you've even met face to face. Where people used to be able to discard polaroids of less-than-flattering situations, and regretful anecdotes about past relationships were only exposed during ventilations between friends as opposed to status updates, every thought, embarrassing moment, and personal anecdote can now be garnered faster than one can say "Google". As Complex puts it, "Because one of your supposed friends tagged an incriminating picture of you on Facebook and now you have to explain to your precious princess girlfriend why her seemingly straight-laced knight in shining armor was acting out a scene from a Girls Gone Wild DVD. Good luck with that, and, in the future, make sure you set your Facebook tags so you can approve them first."

3.Sentimentalities Like Candid Photos And Handwritten Messages Are No More

"There's a shoebox in my closet where I keep every love letter, scribbled note, or snapshot from dudes of yore, and ever since I signed my first cell phone contract, my contributions to my shoebox have dwindled. Coincidence? I think not." This anecdote came from Thought Catalog's Anna Goldfarb, who went on to note other sentimentalities that have long lost their novelty — and become pretty much nonexistent — in today's tech-driven dating culture. Gone are the days when a ticket stub from the first movie you saw with your S.O. Instead, we "check in" on Facebook about which theater we are at, which movie we are seeing, and who we are with. This saturation of interconnectedness completely nixes the privacy of a first date — along with any subsequent dates. Candid photos no longer are found in a prized shoebox, but rather on a slew of social media websites and apps where they are put through a variety of filters and mock airbrushing for all the world to see. As for handwritten messages, has anyone picked up a pencil lately for anything? Even grocery lists can be converted to text or a "notes" function on smartphones. Rather than passing a handwritten note in glass that has been conspicuously folded into what may or may not be an origami heart, teenagers are tweeting their inner monologues for all the world to see.

2.Intimate Moments Have Lost Their Intimacy

"If it's not Facebook official, it doesn't count," has become a popular mantra of the 21st century's dating generation. The only two people that truly know the depth and intimacy involved in a romantic relationship are…well…the two people involved. Social media has dismantled a fourth wall that used to exist in dating. Sure, facets of your relationship would be revealed during outings with friends and family, but there are other private moments that are arguably better left out of the public eye. Back before the advent social media and internet becoming a household commodity, people that you knew from middle school wouldn't have an all-access pass to your relationship status and intimate date nights. Today, failing to list your exclusivity — or lack thereof — on your Facebook profile is met with slackened jaws and knitted brows of concern. "Is he your boyfriend?" "Why aren't you two Facebook official yet?" "What do you mean he's 'not into social media'? Clearly, he must be cheating on you."

1.Expecting The Unexpected Is Archaic

Because of social media and technology, the beauty of happenstance has become archaic. Hearing stories about how two people met serendipitously has kind of become like a shooting star — you're lucky if you see it once, if at all. I remember the mantra about love "happening when you least expect it" growing up, but those words have seemingly long been forgotten by today's dating culture. Being that so many people meet online, through apps, or are at least holding several dating site accounts means that everyone is looking for that person (or several people). This now commonplace behavior upends the pleasant surprise people used to experience when happening upon a compatible mate in the most random of circumstances. Moreover, there are still plenty of opportunities throughout everyday life that could lead to a moment of romantic happenstance, but the prevalence of dating apps and websites could actually prevent us from becoming privy to these real-life encounters.

审校：彼得潘 编辑：listen 来源：前十网