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Please say hello to Dr. Phil I made it I made it thank you!
欢迎菲尔医生 我终于来到这个舞台上了 我做到了 谢谢大家
thank you so much! gotta tell you what, Jimmy a squirrel in a top hat is like a donkey in a dress
非常感谢 我必须得跟你说 带礼帽的松鼠就像是穿裙子的驴
you can take it to the prom but if you tried to make it wear a lipstick you're gonna get kicked
你可以带它去舞会，但要是想给它画个口红，你会被踢的
go and take a seat if you walk like a turkey and talk like a turkey you can put sunglasses on it
找个位子坐吧 如果你走路说话都像个火鸡一样 再给它戴副太阳眼镜
put it right on a horn frog and call it a unicorn,but that doesn't mean you're gonna get a bingo am I right?
给角蛙戴上然后叫它独角兽，但并不能说明你成功了 我说的对吗？
what do you...... what do you doing what is this? what do you doing?
你......你在这儿干嘛呢？这什么情况 你要干什么？
Oh!don't make a pig out of a peanut Jimmy seriously, what the...what are you doing here?
花生是长不出猪来的，吉米 严肃点，你到底来这里干嘛
what are you doing here? what do you mean? I mean what are you doing?
你在这里干什么？你什么意思？我的意思是你来这里干什么？
what is this outfit why he dress like this? where is doctor Phil? it's supposed to be doctor Phil
闹的这一出是要干嘛 为什么穿成这样，菲尔医生在哪儿？出场的应该是菲尔医生的
I know ,but you said that I can be on the show today when we were in therapy
我知道，但是我们今天去做咨询的时候你说我可以上你的节目的
Hey listen!I know Marsh is coming on Friday ,and I didn't say i would help you for motive
我知道马什周五要来，我也确实说了希望我们能有进展
I did not say......No......you would be on the show ,you said I would be on the show
-我没说你今天可以上节目-不，你说了
No,I said I would try to get you on the show tonight and we have a very very busy night
不，我说的是我会尽力让你参加今天的节目 我们的节目时间很紧
I have the whole therapy session on tape I have it,I can't show it
我有整个咨询过程的录像带 我真的有，也可以放出来给大家看
I know what I said that ......that's private
我知道我自己说了什么 那是隐私啊
let's the audience decide if it's private or not you think it's private?
我们让观众来决定这是不是隐私 你们认为这是隐私吗
I guess they don't think it's private so,I do wanna show this because eh......
我猜他们不认为这是隐私 我想把这个展示给大家 因为呃......
I just wanna give you an idea what kind of guy this is,the doctor here and I decided to work our issues out with therapist,yes?
我想让大家知道他到底是个什么样的人，我和那儿的医生决定要通过咨询师来解决我们之间的问题，对吧
I...... we did......no I thought this was supposed to be private
我......-是的 不 我以为这事儿挺隐私的
there was a camera crow in the room,how private did you think it was?show the tape,because I want people to see this
房间里放着一台摄像机，你觉得这能有多隐私？赶紧放吧，我想让你们看看
so,how are you feeling about today?
你今天感觉怎么样？
you know,I feel nerve......I feel anxious and I feel nervous
我感觉有点焦虑，还有点紧张
but I also feel......I guess hopeful? you feel open?
但是我又感觉......怀抱着希望 你愿意坦诚以对吗？
I don't know ,it starts to a hard thing you know,I mean it's a hard thing see,think you are ready?
我不知道，这是件很困难的事 你知道，事情本身也挺困难的 所以，你准备好了吗？
to let this person back to your life?
让这个人回到你的生活里
I think so,yeah! I think eh,I am willing to give a shot um, you know, to talk let's do it
嗯，准备好了，我愿意为之努力 你懂的，积极沟通 好的，那就开始吧
hi please come in thank you! Jimmy so what are you hoping to get out of today? how can I help you guys?
嗨 请进 谢谢 吉米 你们今天想说些什么呢 我能为你们做些什么
um...... he promised me over a decade ago that I was gonna be able to be a guest on the show
他十年前承诺我总有一天我会以嘉宾的身份出现在吉米秀的舞台上
so,for a decade you've been waiting?
所以你等了十年
I......I've taken over or Jimmy would say he's been nice enough after giving me a room where I can and I wait every night,every night
我已经接手了吉米给我的一间在他看来不错的屋子，我可以来了之后在里面等着，每天晚上哦
so for a decade,you've been waiting?have you ever considered not coming any more? but I am scheduled to be on the show
所以这十年来你一直在等待，你有考虑过不要继续等待了吗 但是我已经安排好我的行程了
you know I mean I......he is scheduled to know listening it's in the listening you have to come
-你知道的......-他的行程已经安排好了 已经在行程表里了 你就必须得到
no,listen,every night and if you don't go it's mean......you know then and it'll be like a big time......
每天晚上的行程都排好了，如果不去的话，好像就变成你的问题了
listening ,if it's in the listening,you don't really have a choice you have to go
嗯，如果已经安排了行程，那就没有其他选择了，你必须得去
and what's your perspective on this?what do you think?
你的想法是什么？你怎么看
I......I tried to get him on the show I mean we have one hour show every night ok?
我一直努力着让他上我的节目 我们的节目每天就一个小时时间
we have other guests which he doesn't care about obviously ,and we have a monologue to do,we have a band
我们有其他的嘉宾安排 显然他并不是很在意，还有很多独白，还有乐队
sometimes we have important commercials to run and it's hard to each......
有时候还有很重要的商业广告要播 所以有时候很难......
eh,you know,listen,I understand his point view,but he hasn't understand my point view,what do you think his point view is?
-听着，我理解他的想法，但是他貌似并不了解我 那你以为他的想法是什么
he thinks the world revolves around him he thinks he is the only celebrity in California
他以为世界是围着他转的 他以为他是加利福尼亚唯一的名人
I mean.....you think it's been unreasonable yeah, I do ,I do I mean it
-我是说......-你觉得他有点不可理喻 嗯嗯，是的 我的意思是......
See that thing is totally getting turned around. This is what he does,and what he does so well,he likes talks to talk right?
他完全在颠倒是非 这就是他做的，做的真漂亮，他喜欢说段子
and now,he makes me think I'm crazy
现在他弄的好像是我疯了一样
it's all about him,that's the thing what you imagine feels like to be him every day?
-说来说去都是他，事情就是这样 你有想过成为他是一种什么样的感觉吗
I imagine it would suck to be him, I mean first of all,look at him
那感觉太糟了 首先，看看他
you know, I mean he is any trying to be a movie star and...... what does that mean? what?
我的意思是 他竟然想当一个电影明星 并且......那是什么意思？什么？
look at him,I am just looking at his face and looking at his body,it's not a movie star face and not a movie star body
你看看他，看他的长相和身材，既没有能当电影明星的脸蛋，也没有当明星的身材
so now,I am I understand he is trying are you understanding?
所以现在，我......我能理解他一直在努力尝试 你能理解吗
fine,he is just...... It's not...... he...... is verbally abusive to me and couches it as truth
嗯，他......但是就是不是......他一直用言语辱骂我 弄的好像还跟真的一样
you know,what am I supposed to do?when you wanted to buy that zoo,what did I tell you?
-我要怎么做呢 -当你要买那家动物园的时候，我是怎么跟你说的
the zoo was for both of us the zoo was supposed to be something beautiful it wasn't for both of us
我买那家动物园都是为了我们俩 那座动物园应该是很美好的东西 那不是为了我们
it was for both of us,you never even showed up
就是为了我们，你都没有现身过
I don't like animals that much you didn't even give it a chance
-我不是很喜欢动物 你都不愿意给我们一个机会
you didn't......you didn't even try you never even saw the zoo
你都没有尝试过 甚至你都没有去看一眼
what are you hoping to accomplish by buying the zoo?
买了动物园之后你们打算怎么做呢
I just want to build something with him and share and nurture it and watch it grow
我只想和他一起共同建造一些东西 共同分享，照顾它们，看着它们成长
and those animals were just...... that was our chance
那些动物是......那是我们的机会
ok,but no,I live,you know,at the show and dressing room and you know,
-好吧 我每天呆在化妆室里 你知道的
I'm excited about coming out every night
想到能够从那里出去走到舞台上就兴奋不已
is there something that you feel particularly angry at with Matt?
你有没有因为什么事对马特特别生气呢
I am angry that he is angry, I do my best to get him on the show every night
我生气是因为他在生我的气，我一直都在尽我最大的努力让他上我的节目
and he is so s......I mean he is so spoiled for those attach to him
但是他......我是说他被身边的那些人给惯坏了
I know that ,I know what goes on on the Hollywood sets ok?
我知道的，我知道在好莱坞的那一套好吗
he's in his trailer he's got the, you know,star around the door
他有专门的房车 车门上挂满星星
but that's not how it is here,I mean this is my show and he thinks it's his show
但是那一套在我这里行不通，这是我的地盘，但他还以为这是他的舞台
it was that one time I took the ...over and...busted the ratings wide open
曾经有一次这的确是我的舞台 我掌控了舞台，收视率放肆飙升
say more about that no,no say more about that,why would I want to say more about that?
这个多说一点吧 不，别说了，为什么还要说呢
that was a difficult thing for me that was a felony,I was kidnapped really? I was held against my will
这是我来说太痛苦了 那是重罪，我被绑架了 真的吗 是的，违背了我的意愿
how does it feel like to be sitting there wishing you around the Jimmy Kimmel show not being able to
你坐在那儿是什么感觉？很想上节目但却不能上
what does that feel? I was terrified it's really? yeah! ok!ok!yeah
那种感觉怎么样？我被吓到了 真的吗 嗯 好吧！好吧
you taped up my headkeep talking,keep talking what else did you feel like?
-你用胶带绑住了我...... 你继续说，继续说 然后呢？你还感觉到了什么
it felt like duct tape's suffocating me that was how I felt like
我感觉那些胶带要让我窒息了 那就是我的感受
everything he's just said,except for the duct tape,happens to me every night
他刚刚说的一切，除了胶带那部分，每天都在我身上发生
so you want him to experience what it felt like to be you
所以你想让他体验一下你的那种感受
I wanted him to know what it like to try to be on the show
我想让他知道，当你非常努力的想要上节目
but it's not on the show and you can't get to the show
但却上不了 不能上节目
the show is right there and you can't get to it
舞台近在咫尺，可你却到达不了
so how did you work though that? we didn't really talk about that no
你们有沟通过这个问题吗 我们还没有好好就这个问题进行沟通 没有
is there anything eh......that you like about each other
有没有彼此身上的某种特质让你们互相喜欢的呢
can you say something nice about each other? I like some of his friends
能说一些关于对方的优点吗 我喜欢他的某些朋友
you know all right,to be fair,I like the show it's a very nice thing to say
你知道，本 好吧，公平一点，我喜欢他的节目 这样说感觉很好
I would't ,you know,waited for twelve years
我不会为了登上这个舞台一直等了12年
to get on if I didn't like the show well,you know,I mean,that's I appreciate that I do
如果不是真心喜欢这个节目的话 嗯，我想说，这真是......你这么说，我很感激 真的
so guys ,we are just about out of our time suppose to start wrapping it up
好的，两位，马上就要到时间了 该做下总结了
but i am really very impressive with the way you guys handled each other and communicated and
你们处理事情的方式，真诚的沟通都让我印象深刻
so I think this has been really good
一切都很顺利
what I'd like to do now is having you guys looking at each other
现在我想让你们看着彼此
and make some sort of commitment to the relationship,maybe you're gonna work it on
然后对彼此作出一些承诺，对于你们改善关系会有帮助
so Jimmy,let's start with you
吉米，先从你开始
I hope you know that where I'm coming from is that I have been trying to get you on the show
我希望你知道你能站到我的角度，能理解我，我一直都在努力尝试着让你登上这个舞台
I've been trying really hard,and I feel like you don't appreciate it,but I will try harder in the future
真的非常努力，但我感觉你一点也不感激，但我以后一定会更加努力的
if this is important to you we'll try to get you on the show just not tonight
如果这对你真的很重要的话 我们会努力让你上节目的 只是不是今晚
this counseling thing is gonna on for pretty long time
这个咨询已经占了很长时间了
thank you!that means a lot it sounds,you know,very genuine and......
谢谢你这么说，这对我来说意义很大 听起来也很诚恳 并且......
it was I'll commit to another twelve years in my room at the show you know,I mean it is my home now
我是真诚的 我在此承诺我会继续下一个12年的等待 那个化妆室现在都变成我的家了
you know it would be tough for me just to give that up
对我来说就那样放弃的话也很难
and I love it ,i'd love it if like maybe I can get a television
我很爱那个地方，如果能给我一台电视机就更好了
Just cause there's no windows ,you know...... now you can just...... we could probably......
但是那里没有窗户，你知道的 现在你能......我们也许能够......
I bet we can get an old television in therethat'll be amazing, that'll be amazing
-我想我们能给你弄到一台旧的电视机 那实在是太好了，太好了
just to distract me a little bit cause my mind like just......
能够转移我的注意力，因为我的心思......
you know if...... I would love like a wifi connection that would be......
如果...... 如果能连上无线网就好了 那将会......
yeah!yeah,that's kind of no-can-do No, I know I know You don't need to give me anything
嗯嗯，那貌似不太可能实现 我懂 我懂 你不用满足我的一切要求
this is in the basement,so the wifi is not very fast this doesn't work at all down there,but......
因为是在地下室，所以无线网络不是很好 完全不行，但是......
listen,you guys I am very happy with the way you've communicated today yeah,me too
听着，两位 我非常高兴你们能进行这样一番沟通 嗯，我也是
as a sign of your commitment to each other and the work you've done,i think it's really important
作为你们对彼此作出的承诺的标志，还有为此付出的努力
to end our couple session with a hug ,so I'd like you guys to do that
用拥抱来结束我们今天的咨询会面是很有意义的，我希望你们能这样做
now just get up and get to each other you mean,like hug? hug each other
现在就站起来吧，靠近一点 你是说一个拥抱？拥抱对方？
yeah,like a hug yeah! yeah just hug? hug it out that's right
嗯，拥抱一下对方 好的，好的 就拥抱一下 拥抱一下 这就对了嘛
may I pat him? yeah,pat him if you're good very nice
-我能拍拍他吗 嗯，喜欢就拍吧 非常好
how's that feel? feels really good just a little bit too much
感觉怎么样 感觉很不错 拥抱的有点太过用力了
are you guys alright there? yeah! thank you!yeah,sure
-你们还好吗 -是的，还好-谢谢 不用客气
see you guys next time see you guys I said you're not gonna be on the show tonight
下次再见 再见 我说了不是今晚让你上节目
we'll be right back with the real doctor Phil,Kimmel,come on
广告之后是真正的菲尔医生，基梅尔，过来
