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Are there any good reasons to have children? Van der Lugt finds all of the most common ones wanting.
有没有任何让我们生孩子的好的理由？范德卢格特发现所有最常见的理由都不充分。
Among the “worse reasons” she cites are “to remain ‘in-step’ with [one’s] peers,” to save a relationship, or out of fear of regret or missing out.
她列举的“更糟的理由”包括“与同龄人保持‘同步’”、挽救一段关系，或出于害怕后悔或错过。
Uncritically accepting “the Biological Narrative,” as she calls “the language of biology, of hormones, of physical urges,” demeans the procreative act.
不加批判地接受“生物叙事”，正如她所说的“生物学的语言、激素的语言、生理冲动的语言”，贬低了生育行为。
Giving little credence to the evolutionary drive to propagate the human species, she instead suggests that “we might do better to emphasise not the urge itself, but the ability consciously to act, or not to act, upon it.”
她不太相信进化会推动人类繁衍，相反，她认为“我们或许应该更加强调的不是这种冲动本身，而是有意识地对其采取行动或不采取行动的能力。”
Other stock answers on the “better” end of the spectrum, such as “happiness, fulfillment, meaningfulness,” are also deemed insufficient.
其他一些“更好”常见答案，如“幸福、满足、有意义”，也被认为是不够的。
In van der Lugt’s view, expecting a child to provide those things places too great a burden on the child.
在范德卢格特看来，期望孩子提供这些东西会给孩子带来太大的负担。
Even the most obvious reason, “love” (my instinctive answer), is dismissed as logically inadequate.
甚至连最明显的原因，“爱”（我本能的回答），也被认为在逻辑上是不充分的而被摒弃了。
“Even if it is possible to experience love for a non-existent child,” van der Lugt writes, “love alone cannot justify all things.”
“即使有可能体验到对一个不存在的孩子的爱，”范德卢格特写道，“但仅靠爱并不能证明一切都是合理的。”
After all, she notes, when it comes to existing people, mere love (or what she says is more accurately termed “longing” in the case of a child one hasn’t yet met) is not an adequate reason to do anything to them without their consent.
毕竟，她指出，当涉及到现存的人时，仅仅是爱（或者她说在孩子尚未见面的情况下更准确地称为“渴望”），如果没有他们的同意，就不是对他们做任何事情的充分理由。
If the question has no one simple answer, it is still, van der Lugt insists, vital to ask it, and to ask it in the correct way, using language that moves away from entitlement and desire (“having” or “wanting” children) and toward “a concept of fragility and accountability”—the idea that we are entrusted with children, responsible for them.
如果这个问题没有一个简单的答案，范德卢格特坚持认为，提出这个问题仍然至关重要，而且要以正确的方式提出，使用的语言要摆脱权利和欲望（“拥有”或“想要”孩子），转向“脆弱性和责任感的概念”——即我们受托照顾孩子，对他们负责。
Although many people speak of childbearing as “giving the gift of life,” van der Lugt argues that this unidirectional characterization is mistaken.
虽然许多人将生育称为“给予生命的礼物”，但范德卢格特认为这种单向的描述是错误的。
“If life is ‘given’ at all, it is given both to the parents and to the child: neither is giver, but to both it is bestowed,” she writes.
“如果生命是‘被给予’的，那么它是同时给予父母和孩子的：父母和孩子都不是给予者，而是被赐予者。”她写道。
Thus, perhaps, one possible approach to begetting is to begin with humility, combined with a deep appreciation for the fragility of existence.
因此，一种可能的生育方法或许是从谦卑开始，再结合对生存脆弱性的深刻理解。
Van der Lugt’s model for this stance is once again Etty Hillesum.
再一次，范德吕特的这种立场的典范是埃蒂·希尔萨姆。
Writing in the Nazi transit camp of Westerbork, where she remained for several months before boarding a train to Poland, where she and her family were killed, Hillesum insists that “life is glorious and magnificent,” even as she bears witness to the misery around her.
在纳粹中转营韦斯特博克写作时，她在登上开往波兰的火车之前在那里停留了几个月，她和她的家人在那里被杀害，希勒斯姆坚持认为“生活是光荣而壮丽的”，即使她见证了周围的苦难。
Her searching examination of her own existence left her full of gratitude, yet still did not compel her to give life to someone else, for how could she insist, or predict, that that person might face the adversity she experienced with the same extraordinary grace.
她对自己存在的深入探索使她充满感激之情，但这一切没有成为她生孩子的理由，因为她怎么能坚持或预测那个人可能会以同样非凡的优雅面对她所经历的逆境。
As van der Lugt writes, “The principle of gratitude and acceptance, according to which life is worth living ‘despite everything,’ is one that she applies firmly to herself, but only hesitatingly to others.”
正如范德卢格特所写的那样，“感恩和接受的原则，即尽管一切都不如意，生活仍然值得过下去，这是她坚定地应用于自己身上的原则，但对他人却只是犹豫不决地应用。”
Those who do choose to beget might also adopt this same humility.
那些选择生育的人也可能会采取同样的谦逊态度。
Bidding someone forth, conjuring a new person from a couple of cells, is an act of tremendous magnitude, one whose meaning is perhaps too great and abstract to grasp or articulate with any precision.
召唤出某人，从几个细胞中变出一个新的人，是一种极其重大的行为，其意义也许过于伟大和抽象，以至于无法精确地把握或表达。
Before undertaking it, we should commit to the same unsparing self-examination.
在承担之前，我们应该致力于同样无情的自我检查。
This, in the end, is van der Lugt’s request of us: to pose the question of begetting to ourselves, and to answer it for only ourselves.
归根结底，这就是范-德-卢格对我们的要求：向我们自己提出 "是否生儿育女 "的问题，并只为我们自己回答这个问题。
