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Welcome to the tragic universe that is my sad life.
欢迎到悲惨世界，那是我悲惨的生活
Why? I'll give you five major reasons why.
你问为什么？我给你五个理由
Number one,my parents are from the Stone Age.
第一，我父母来自石器时代
No us, no you.- God knows what you'd do.
没有我们那有你，上帝知道你们干了什么
You understand? You wouldn't exist.- Yeah.
你明白吗？你将不存在，耶！
Number two, they hate me having a life'cause theirs are practically over
第二条，他们恨我拥有的生命，因为他们的生命快结束
and mine's just starting.
而我的才刚刚开始
And it's not good enough.- Honestly. Every year it's...
那不够好，说真的，每年...
Number three....a performance...
第三，一个演出
My little sister's bonkers. Poor Angus will need even more therapy than me.
我妹妹精神不正常，可怜的Angus（小猫），它比我需要治疗
A lot of trouble!...because of your fifteenth birthday...
太多麻烦！因为你的15岁生日
Number four......it's not good enough.
第四，还不够。
... my nose is the size of Jupiter....so ungrateful.
我的超大号尺寸的鼻子。。这么不领情。。
I need to go into an ugly home.- Georgia,
我需要生在一个丑陋的家庭。Georgia
what have you gone and done now?
你现在要去那儿，你做了什么？
How did you manage to pluck them all so quickly?
怎么这么快眉毛就掉光了？
You haven't, have you?
不是你干的吧，是你自己吗？
Oh, crikey. Bob, she shaved them.
喔，真是，Bob，她把眉毛刮了
Number five, I'll never get a boyfriend.
第五，我永远找不到男朋友
What's the hurry with growing up so fast?
为什么这么快就长大了呢？
Why don't you just enjoy being 14?
为什么不一直在开心的14岁呢？
