Topic（题目）:

Every university wants to attract more top students to their school, the problem is: should a university spend a lot of money funding social activities to achieve this goal? Please write down your opinion toward this statement.

Target text（文章正文）:

Every university wants to attract more top students to their school, the problem is: should a university spend a lot of money funding social activities to achieve this goal? My answer is not. Spending a lot of money on such activities does not necessarily benefit the universities' reputation and may not attract many excellent students as they expect.

First of all, universities should pay more attention on the academic staff and faculty members. As we all known, outstanding teachers can create good academic atmosphere as well as guarantee the quality of education. The teachers with comprehensive knowledge are more likely to be admired by excellent students and stimulate their interest in learning. For example, the most famous universities like Yale and Harvard have many excellent professors who get many prizes and publish a lot of famous books and essays. As a result, they attract many top students all over the world. Actually, the best advertisement of one university is professor.

Furthermore, hardware equipments are another factor that should be taken seriously consideration. With those sound living and studying environment, students’ daily life will become more convenient and comfortable. For instance, advanced multimedia classrooms can improve teaching efficiency as well as enrich teaching content and form; comfortable dwelling and dining places improve the quality of students'life in school; Doing excises in a modern gym help students build up their constitution. Obviously, all of these are attractive elements when a student to choose his university. Therefore, the quality of hardware facilities is the basic factors for a good university.

Most importantly, career planning and development of students are too essential to be ignored by the university. It must be pointed out that the employment of students is related to the future of universities and high employment rate helps to establish the good fame for schools. Take myself as an example, when I chose my university three years ago, the employment prospects and rate are two principle concerns for me. After all, the issue of hunting jobs for college students is increasingly and seriously important in current days. It is a essential problem for every family in China. Thus, it is no doubt that universities should sparing no effort to providing more training for students to improve their abilities and knowledge to deal with the employment pressure.

From the analysis above, it is obvious that there are more important issues for a good university to improve, such like recruit more excellent professors, improve the hardware equipments and ensure the employment of graduates. Therefore, we can safely come to the conclusion that one university should not spend much money only on the social activities.

Feedback and Review（点评及修改）

优点：

总的来说，本篇文章整体结构合理，观点清晰，分论点到位，论证结构和逻辑都不错，内容充实。

缺点及改进建议：

1、尽量多阅读范文，模仿好的文章中作者阐述论证观点的方式。

2、多阅读不同类型话题的文章，积累专业作家针对不同话题的观点内容。

3、可以多引用别人的观点内容。

4、阅读范文过程中，注意作者如何反向论证观点。