Unit 05
　　It's Great to Be a Guy/Woman Because...
　　It's Great to Be a Guy Because...
　　Our last name stays put.
　　We can be President.
　　The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
　　Car mechanics tell us the truth.
　　We don't give a darn if someone doesn't notice our new haircut.
　　Same work... more pay.
　　Gray hair and wrinkles add character.
　　People never glance at our chest when we're talking to them.
　　The occasional belch is practically expected.
　　New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle our feet.
　　One mood, all the time.
　　Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
　　We know stuff about tanks and airplanes.
　　We don't have to pretend we're "freshening up" to use the bathroom.
　　Bathroom lines are 80% shorter.
　　Old friends don't care if we've lost or gained weight.
　　When surfing channels, we don't have to stop on every shot of someone crying.
　　We can be showered and ready in 10 minutes.
　　If someone forgets to invite us something, they can still be our friend.
　　None of our co-workers have the power to make us cry.
　　We can whip our shirt off on a hot day.
　　A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
　　Dry cleaners and hair cutters don't rob us blind.
　　We can leave the motel bed unmade.
　　We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
　　If we're 34 and single, nobody notices.
　　Everything on our face stays its original color.
　　We can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat.
　　Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
　　We don't have to clean our apartment if the meter reader is coming.
　　We can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift.
　　We are not expected to know the names of more than five colors.
　　We are unable to see wrinkles in our clothes.
　　Our belly usually hides our big hips.
　　One wallet and one pair of shoes, one color, all seasons.
　　Christmas sopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives, on December 24th, in 45 minutes.
　　It's Great to Be a Woman Because...
　　We got off the Titanic first.
　　We can scare male bosses with mysterious gynecological disorder excuses.
　　If we marry someone 20 years younger, we know we look like an idiot.
　　We have the ability to dress ourselves.
　　We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
　　There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
　　We can fully assess a person just y looking at their shoes.
　　We can make comments about how silly men are in their presence, because they aren't listening anyway.