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You suck at PEAS, Yeah you totally suck.
你不会吃豌豆，对，你压根就不会
Step one to making this salad is to take an extra large size pea and then give that a good roll.
做这个沙拉的第一步是取一个巨大号的豌豆，然后力度适中的滚一下它。
Now, these are not bite-sized. So you're gonna want to break them down a little more than that.
现在，这些还不是一口能吃下去的大小。所以你应该把他们滚得比这个再小一些。
Then you want to take an extra large size radish and also give that a nice shove.
然后你需要拿出一个巨大的红萝卜然后也不轻不重的推它一下。
These are perfect chopping size now.
他们现在这个大小最适合切了。
Fun fact about radishes: This is where red skittles come from.
关于红萝卜有一个有趣的事实：红色的彩虹糖就是从这里来的。
Kinda regret that I'm off sugar right now.
有点后悔我现在戒糖了。
Now quickly rinse off the vegetables' natural disgustitude.
现在快速的洗干净蔬菜上面的天然残留物。
I like to cut them into little sticks. You can cut them however you want.
我喜欢把他们切成这种小条条。你们爱怎么切怎么切。
You can do quarters which is probably too big.
你也可以一个萝卜平均切成四块，缺点就是大了点。
Maybe eighths is more your size.
没准平均切成八块可能更符合你的要求
Or one-sixteenths.
或者平均切成十六块
You can also get creative and cut a perfect square.
你也可以发挥你的创造力，然后切出一个完美的正方形。
Or an isosceles triangle, Or you can go scalene.
或者等腰三角形，或者你也可以切成不等边三角形。
The radish rhombus is super trendy right now.
现在可流行菱形红萝卜了。
You can scare the bejesus out of somebody by carving a wild poison tail radish.
你还可以雕一个赌尾小萝卜来吓唬别人。
You could chop them into the shape of a guy.
你也可以把它们切成小人的形状。
Or, uh, in the shape of a guy holding a helium balloon.
或者，额，切成一个小人拿着一个氢气球的形状。
Or in the shape of a guy hula hooping.
或者切成一个小人转呼啦圈的形状。
Or in the shape of a guy doing a sweet christ air off a launch ramp.
或者切成一个小人从斜坡上跳起来做一个空中耶稣式的形状。
Totally radish-cal.
太刺激了。
Or in the shape of a guy who's fishing.
或者切成一个人在钓鱼的形状。
And he's having a really good day because he caught this sweet fish.
并且今天是他的好日子因为他刚抓到了这条大鱼。
That's being chased by this really fast electric eel.
紧随其后的还有这条十分灵活的电鳗。
But it's a bad day because he missed out on this treasure that was just below the fish he caught.
但是其实也不是什么好日子，因为他刚好错过了那条鱼正下方的宝藏。
And it gets worse than that because he was parked illegally on the dock so he got a ticket.
并且一切都在变得更糟糕，因为他刚刚因为在港口违规停车被开了罚单。
And also he had some investments and the stock market just crashed
并且他的投资在刚刚崩溃的股票市场中统统套了牢。
And also the fish's wife is home.
这条鱼的妻子还在家等着。
She's worried sick about her husband.
她特别担心他的丈夫。
She's wondering when he's gonna come home.
她迫不及待的想知道他何时会回家。
But he's never gonna come home.
但是他永远都不会回家了。
No matter what she does.
无论她做什么都无济于事。
And that's the sad truth about how you should never play with radishes.
这就是为什么你永远不应该玩弄萝卜的可悲之处。
For the dressing I'm gonna take some olive oil.
我要用一些橄榄油来做酱汁。
Whoa, no. No no no no.
哦天哪，糟了。糟了糟了糟了糟了。
The stopper came off inside the cap.
控制流量的小玩意卡在瓶盖里了。
For the dressing let's take some olive oil.
我要用一些橄榄油来做酱汁。
There we go more like that.
这么多就好了，差不多就是这样。
I'm gonna go with some apple Cider vinegar.
然后我要加入一下苹果醋。
Little bit of Dijon.
少许法式芥末酱。
And a squeeze of lemon.
然后挤一点新鲜柠檬汁进去。
And some pepper pepper pepper.
然后加入许多许多许多胡椒。
A little too much of Vinegar, but it's still good.
醋有点放多了，但是味道还是不错的。
Now we're gonna put the peas on to boil.
现在我们要煮豌豆了。
If you're using fresh peas, you only want to boil them for about a minute or so.
如果你用的是新鲜的豌豆，那么煮个一两分钟就差不多了。
If you overdo it, you lose a lot of flavor and they get too mushy.
如果你煮过头了，豌豆就会流失掉大部分风味并且变得面面的。
So I'm gonna set a timer so I don't overcook them.
所以我要设定一个计时器防止我煮的时间太久。
Take a bunch of mint leaves. And chop these up.
取一些薄荷叶。然后切碎它们。
That's pretty good.
切成这样就差不多了。
Oh, the peas must be ready.
噢，豌豆一定煮好了。
Let's get these off the heat and rinse them under cold water so they stop cooking.
把煮豌豆的锅从火上移开，然后用凉水冲洗它们，这样他们就不会因为余温而煮过头。
Now we're gonna combine everything.
现在我们要将所有东西放在一起。
Got our peas. Our radishes.
先是我们的豌豆，红萝卜。
Let's pour the dressing in.
再浇上酱汁。
Get that mint in there.
把薄荷扔进去。
Stir this up a bit.
稍微搅拌均匀。
Now pour a small glass of milk into a white bowl.
现在在一个白色的碗中倒入一小杯牛奶。
Give that a quick stir and you end up with feta cheese.
然后简单的搅拌一下，你就会得到羊奶芝士。
There you have it: delicious Pea Radish Feta Salad.
然后你就做好了：美味的豌豆红萝卜羊奶芝士沙拉。
Remember this is a summer dish.
别忘了这是一道夏季美食。
So you're gonna want to be wearing your sunscreen when you eat it.
所以记得抹上防晒霜再吃它。
And remember when you make this, don't listen to the haters.
还有记住当你做这道菜的时候，别听那些讨厌的人说什么。
Someone comes around and says, "Hey, I heard pea salad is for weaklings".
有的人会过来跟你说，“嗨，我听说废物才吃豌豆沙拉”。
You just look them in the eye and you tell them:
你只需要直视着他们的眼睛然后告诉他们：
I'm the kinda guy.
我就是那种人。
Who likes a pea salad every once in a while.
时不时会想吃豌豆沙拉。
I'm not gonna eat it everyday of the week.
我又不会天天吃它。
But you can bet your ass that it'll disappear if it's in front of me.
但你无需质疑，如果把它出现我面前我一定能一扫而光。
Peas. Please wanna live in a world where they grow on trees.
豌豆。他们生长在树上。
Yeah, I cross the seas.
耶， 我越过了海。
I drop to my knees.
我屈下了膝。
I'd even go to the store and buy a bag of.
我甚至走进商店买了一袋。
Peas. You suck at Peas.
豌豆。你不会吃豌豆。
