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惊悚版麦当劳麦满分

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The first step to making a better McDonald's Egg McMuffin, also known as a McBlanald's Begg McDuffin, for trademark purposes, is to go into an English bog and get some fresh English muffins.

想做出更好的麦当劳鸡蛋麦满分(出于商标原因,也可以叫它麦当当鸡蛋麦碗荤),第一步就是去英式沼泽里拿一些新鲜的英式松饼。

Not that processed stuff.

不要那种加工过的。

Now that one's perfectly ripe.

要这种熟得刚刚好的。

If you don't have access to an English bog, just go into your French garden and grab some French muffins.

如果你那没有英式沼泽,那就去你的法式花园里拿一些法式松饼。

Then teach them how to be English.

然后教它们怎么变得英式一些。

"It's like wine, but you can eat it."

“这个是能吃的红酒。”

"It's like cheese you can drink."

“这个是可以喝的奶酪。”

"It's like an accordion, but it sounds good."

“这个就像手风琴一样,但是声音是好听的。”

Now we're gonna toast one of these.

现在我们来烤一个这东西。

When you buy one from the restaurant, they seem to toast it like this.

当你从饭店买松饼的时候,他们好像是这样烤的。

Now you don't want to toast it until it's like this.

你可不要把它烤成这样。

Toast it until it's like this.

烤成这样。

Now, that's a perfect toaster crumpet.

这就是完美的烤面饼了。

There are a couple approaches to making a McMuffler-friendly round egg.

有几种方法都可以做出适合麦满分的圆形煎蛋。

The first is through advanced geometric wangjangulation to get the right shape.

第一种方法是通过高级几何搅拌法来煎出正确的形状。

But if you start with the roundest egg you can find, then take the roundest mason jar lid you can find.

但如果你拿一颗你能找到的最圆的鸡蛋,然后再拿一个你能找到的最圆的梅森杯盖。

Spray it with cooking spray and then crack that egg inside.

喷一些烹饪喷雾,然后把鸡蛋打在里面。

Then break the egg, add some salt and pepper pepper pepper.

把蛋黄戳破,加一些盐和胡椒。

Then pour in a bit of water and cover it to baste it for a couple of minutes.

倒一点水,盖上盖子,收汁几分钟。

And you don't even need to flip it and it comes out perfect.

你甚至不需要给它翻面,煎出来就很完美。

And if your hot plate is in the shop, you can always do the old microwave trick.

如果你没有电炉,你还是可以用老式的微波炉法的。

Salt salt salt, pepper pepper pepper.

盐,胡椒。

Put it in the microwave, turn it on, take it out.

放进微波炉,打开,拿出。

Now that's a perfectly round egg.

这就有了一个完美的圆鸡蛋。

A bit thick but that's fine.

有点厚,但也不错。

Let's see here. Let's try the McMedium.

让我们看看做哪一款。我们试试McMedium。

For this sandwich we'll make some simple improvements to the classic Keg McNothing.

对于这款三明治,我们要对经典的Keg McNothing做一些简单的改进。

We'll start with our perfectly toasted English muffin, then spread on some salted butter.

我们首先拿出烤得很完美的英式松饼,往上面涂一些含盐黄油。

Then resist the temptation to just eat it because a buttered English muffin is so good.

忍住想直接吃掉它的欲望,因为抹了黄油的英式松饼真的很好吃。

Next we'll add our perfectly round egg, then add a layer of sliced cheddar cheese.

接着把我们的完美圆鸡蛋放上去,加一层切达奶酪切片。

And then we're gonna fry up a slice of ham until it starts breathing like a lung.

然后我们要煎一片火腿,煎到它开始像肺一样呼吸。

Then put that on top to create a cheese furnace.

然后放在上面,它就变成了一个奶酪炉。

And now we're gonna slice up a dill pickle.

现在我们来切莳萝泡菜。

Then sprinkle that miniature pickle dice on top.

然后把这些微型泡菜丁撒在上面。

Then we'll add a slice of tomato and a whisper of salt and pepper pepper pepper.

然后我们放一片番茄,再加少许盐和胡椒。

Now mayo the other side of the English muffin and throw on the roof.

现在往另半块英式松饼上涂上蛋黄酱,放在最上面。

Feel free to add some hot sauce.

想加辣酱的话请随意。

And for a more authentic McKnucklin' experience, you can grab some paper to make a wrapper and... open it like a gift!

为了获得更真实的McKnucklin体验,你可以拿点纸包一下,然后……像拆礼物一样打开它!

Okay. Hot tip: don't buy recycled paper.

好吧。温馨提示:不要买再生纸。

Also, don't wrap things in paper, just eat them.

还有,不要用纸包东西,吃就行了。

Mmm, that's a damn good McCrawnolds leg McBuffin.

嗯,这款McCrawnolds leg McBuffin太好吃了。

Let's see here. Oh McBesto!

让我们看看下一个做什么。哦,McBesto!

We'll start by mixing together mayonnaise with pesto, creating pest-aise, or mayo-sto as the Italians called it.

我们先把蛋黄酱和香蒜酱混合在一起,做成香黄酱或者蛋蒜酱,意大利人就是这么叫它的。

I'm pretty sure.

我很确定。

We'll slather that onto our toasted formerly French muffins.

我们把它涂在烤好的法式松饼上。

Now we'll add the egg wheel and grate some parmesan cheese.

现在我们放上蛋圈,磨一些帕尔马干酪碎。

You can probably skip salting the egg on this one since the pesto and parmesan are salty.

做这一款的时候你可以不加盐,因为香蒜酱和干酪里都有盐。

Now we'll add sliced tomato.

加上番茄片。

And since I forgot to put the avocado on the bottom, I'm throwing it on the top but that's a mistake.

鉴于我忘了把牛油果铺在最下面一层,我就把它放在上面这层吧,但这是不对的。

Put it on the bottom and stamp it down with a fork or boot and there you have it.

把它放下,用叉子压平,或者用靴子也行,这就做好了。

A re-imagined McZondals b'egg McLuffin also known as the McBesto.

一款重新设计过的McZondals b'egg McLuffin,也叫做McBesto。

For a more authentic McBonald's atmosphere, you might want to create your own Happy Meal box like this perfect one I made here.

为了营造更真实的麦当劳氛围,你可能想要创造自己的开心套餐,就像我做的这个完美的盒子。

Whoop! More like flappy meal, am I right?

哦!更像是松散套餐,是吧?

Oh, there's a toy inside.

哦,里面有玩具耶。

I always loved that.

我可喜欢玩具了。

Help me!

救命!

I think I might have ordered the despair meal?

我觉得我是不是点了绝望套餐?

Let's see here. Oh the McFancy.

让我们看看。哦,是McFancy。

We'll start by mayo-ing our toasted English muffin.

我们从给烤好的英式松饼涂蛋黄酱开始。

It's called an addiction. Don't judge.

这就叫作上瘾。不许评判。

Then we'll add an egg disk, Havarti cheese, and crispy bacon that's probably not quite this over cooked.

然后我们放上鸡蛋盘,哈瓦蒂奶酪,和酥脆培根,最好是别煎得这么过头。

But the crispiness is what keeps you from dragging the sandwich apart like a wild dog when you bite it.

这是这种酥脆的口感能让你在吃三明治的时候不用像个野狗一样撕咬。

Nothing against wild dogs.

没有说野狗不好的意思。

Just don't undercook it.

煎的时间别太短了。

Now we'll add sliced tomato, a touch of salt and some pepper pepper pepper, and a couple basil leaves.

现在我们放上番茄切片,一点盐和一些胡椒,还有一些罗勒叶。

And now we'll paint the ceiling with mayo along with a few drops of white truffle oil.

现在我们往天花板上涂点蛋黄酱,再滴上几滴白松露油。

This stuff used to be considered high-class, but now it's basically the new ranch.

这东西曾经被认为是高级的,但现在基本上就是新的农场酱。

And I never would have thought this until I tasted it myself.

我从来没想过这么搭配,直到我自己尝过之后。

But you're gonna have to trust me here.

但你得相信我。

This makes for an excellent McBlandel z'egg McGuffin.

这是一款非常棒的McBlandel z'egg McGuffin。

Now if you want to complete the McDandals experience, you can make your own Playland.

现在如果你想要完整的麦当劳体验,你可以自己弄一个游乐区。

I've got this ball pit... Whoooooahh!

我这有个海洋球池……哇哦!

Hello?

有人吗?

What the hell?

什么鬼东西?

Oh my god!

天呐!

"Help me!"

“救命!”

Okay, alright, I'll walk back.

好吧,没事,我走回去。

Come on!

来吧!

Are you okay?

你还好吗?

重点单词   查看全部解释    
whisper ['wispə]

想一想再看

n. 低语,窃窃私语,飒飒的声音
vi. 低声

 
minutes ['minits]

想一想再看

n. 会议记录,(复数)分钟

 
classic ['klæsik]

想一想再看

n. 古典作品,杰作,第一流艺术家
adj.

 
grate [greit]

想一想再看

n. 栅 vt. 磨擦,磨碎

联想记忆
jar [dʒɑ:]

想一想再看

n. 不和谐,刺耳声,震动,震惊,广口瓶
vi

联想记忆
resist [ri'zist]

想一想再看

v. 抵抗,反抗,抵制,忍住
n. 防蚀涂层

联想记忆
furnace ['fə:nis]

想一想再看

n. 炉子,熔炉,闷热地带,严峻考验

 
addiction [ə'dikʃən]

想一想再看

n. 沉溺,上瘾

 
spread [spred]

想一想再看

v. 伸展,展开,传播,散布,铺开,涂撒
n.

 
skip [skip]

想一想再看

v. 跳过,略过,遗漏
n. 跳跃,跳读

 

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