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Or in a grand…You know, in a large schema of things, does it really matter?
或者更久…… 从长远来看 它真的很重要吗
Is it worth my worrying, and fretting, and being depressed and upset and anxious about this now?
它真的值得我去担心、焦虑、为之沮丧、为之焦躁吗
Is this really going to matter in a year? And most of the times, it won't matter.
它在一年之后真的会有影响吗 通常情况下都不会
The other side of this is that well, then does anything matter?
从另一方面说 有什么是真的重要的吗
A few years ago, I was asked a very simple question by a friend.
几年前 有个朋友问了我一个非常简单的问题
And he said, "you know, just…" You know we haven't talked about before-this was a close friend.
他说 我们之前从来没聊过这个的 他是我很好的朋友
But…"Can you tell me what psychological maturity is?
但也没聊过 “你能告诉我心理成熟是什么吗
From your research, can you think about what psychological maturity is?"
通过你的研究 你能想明白心理成熟到底是什么吗？”
And off-the-cuff, at that moment-over time I revise the definition a little bit-
就在这一霎那 就在当时 后来我又对这个定义做了些修饰
I said the following: Psychological maturity is about the ability to willingly shift perspective.
我当时这么说 心理成熟就是根据自己的意愿转换角度的能力
And I think it's more or less right. Again, looking at the research about this ability to shift perspective.
我觉得这差不多是对的 基于这些关于转换角度的能力的研究
Why? Or what is this ability to shift perspective?
为什么 这种转换角度的能力是什么
It's the ability when we want to be immersed in the here and now, in the present.
这就是我们希望沉浸在当下的一种能力
And it's the ability to, when we want, take a step back, zoom out both in time and in space,
也正是我们退一步 时间和空间上都退一步
and ask the question, "is this really going to matter? Or in a year?
问这样的问题 “它真的有影响吗 一年之后呢
Or in a grand schema of things, space? Is this really important?"
或者更长远来看呢 它真的很重要吗”
And at the same time, go back almost at will. Have this flexibility to go back
同时随心所欲地回来 能够灵活地将思绪拉回来
and be immersed when listening to a beautiful piece of music, or spending time with people we love.
沉浸于聆听一首美妙的歌 或者和我们所爱的人一起
