Romain Rolland once said:
'Most men die at twenty or thirty;
罗曼·罗兰曾说:
很多人在20岁、30岁的时候就死了,
thereafter they are only reflections
of themselves,for the rest of their lives
they are aping themselves,
一过这个年龄,他们只不过变成了自己的影子,
此后的余生不过在模仿自己中度过。
repeating from day to day
more and more mechanically
and affectedly what they said and did
and thought and loved when they were alive.'
日复一日,
更机械,更装腔作势地重复,
他们有生之年的所作所为、所思所想、所爱所恨。
Recently, I suddenly realized that
this quote is talking about me.
最近,我忽然发现这则引言说的就是我。
I chose a stable job back as a civil servant
in my hometown under my parents' advice
after I graduated from college.
大学毕业之后,
我听从父母的建议,
在家乡找了一个稳定的公务员工作。
The job is easy. And my workload is quite small.
So I have penty of time of mine own to spend.
工作很轻松,工作量也很小。
所以我有充足的时间可以自由支配。
I bought my car and my house
and went on dates which are arranged
by my parents.
Everything goes well in my life.
我买好了车和房子,
并根据父母的安排去约会。
生活中的一切都很顺利。
But, last month
I went to a classmates reunion.
And it crashed my heart.
但是,上个月我去了一个同学聚会。
而我的心彻底被打碎了。
When we were having the meal.
Some of my classmates
talked about their interesting jobs
and interesting challenges
in Internet companies.
宴席上,
有些同学在谈他们在互联网公司
那些有趣的工作、有趣的挑战。
Some of them were talking about
strategies in investing in fund and stocks.
有些谈起他们在基金和股票上的投资策略。
Some of them were talking about
all the new skills they have been learning,
which I hadn't even heard of.
有些则在谈他们在学的一些新技能,
而这些技能我听都没听过。
But I?
All I could talk about was
that my wife just got pregnant.
而我呢?
我能说的只是我太太前不久怀孕了。
And now it seems like my child is about
to take the same boring path that I have taken.
现在看来,
似乎我的孩子
也要走上我走过的这条无聊道路。
Is this the life that I want?
Is this even life?
这真的是我想要的生活吗?
这真的是生活吗?
This suddenly becomes so horrible to me.
I can't live like this.
我突然觉得这无比可怕。
我不能这样生活下去。
And that's why I started to search for a new job.
I don't want to die when I am thiry.
而这,也就是我重新开始找工作的原因。
我不想在30岁就死去。
Life is only worth living
when there are things to explore.
生活,只有在还有新事物可以探索的时候,
才值得活下去。
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